Dear, Rukawa kun
by Crusty Bubblehead
Summary: [Latest summary: There you have it! Rukawa's pov, Itadakimasu!] It's Haruko's POV! It's all about how she felt for the kitsune and her efforts to catch his attention.
1. Bitter Person

**Disclaimer :**** I don't own Slam Dunk, it's Takehiko-senei's.**

**Bitter Person**

I cupped my chin on my palm. I was looking out the window of my classroom, but I wasn't really staring at the view outside.

My mind took me to the scene happened this morning at the school gate.

FLASHBACK

I was entering the school gate when I heard some students yelled out, "Hey! Watched where you were going!!"  

Those seemed angry boys were yelling at a figure that was cycling carelessly.

Rukawa Kaede.

I blushed as that figure passed me on his bike.

But suddenly…BANG!! 

The bike hit the school gate and Rukawa-kun thrown away from his bike.

"Rukawa-kun!! Are you alright!?" I got near him and knelt down to see if he was alright.

Rukawa-kun scratched his head. Oh dear, he looked sleepy. Was he sleeping?

Ignoring me, Rukawa-kun stood up and got on his bike again.

"Rukawa-kun..." I was still worried if he was hurt.

Rukawa-kun gave me a cold stare from the corner of his beautiful eyes.

"A-Are you okay?"

"Yes."

Then he paddled his bike away.

I was relieved that he wasn't hurt, but I was also very sad about the way he acted to me.

He was a cold person, very silent. I supposed I shouldn't expect him to be friendly in answering my late question.

But it really hurts me that he ignored me since I like him so much.

Rukawa-kun…I really wish I could be a close person to you…

END FLASHBACK

TO BE CONTINUED


	2. Impossible Love

Disclaimer : I don't own Slam Dunk. It's Takehiko-sensei's.

Impossible Love

I hurried myself back to my classroom after I returned Mr. Kobayashi's – the math teacher – textbook that he forgot.

But as I walked, I saw Rukawa-kun at the corridor. He was walking towards me.

"Where are you going Rukawa-kun?" I tried to speak as friendly as I could.

"The rooftop," he answered without stopping or even looking at me.

"Why? It's not break time yet," I encouraged myself to open a good conversation.

Rukawa-kun stopped and slightly turned his face to view me, or should I say pierce me with his stare.

"I-I mean, I think you should better go back to your class now because the teacher might be angry," I tried to smile, but I felt my knees shaking a little. Rukawa-kun looked a bit scary.

"None of your business," Rukawa-kun turned and started to walk away.

I was shocked by his mean words. I could feel tears hanging down from the corner of my eyes.

"I was just worrying about, Rukawa-kun!!"

But he kept on walking without looking back.

Cold as usual.

I stared at the back of the one that I care for so much.

Rukawa-kun…was I hoping for an impossible love?

TO BE CONTINUED

Crusty's note : gomennasai for the very short chapter, but the better one will come up soon ^ ^


	3. Good Things Come My Way

**Disclaimer: I don't own Slam Dunk, it's Takehiko-sensei's.**

**Good Things Come My Way**

"Hmm… Usually they put natto here…"

I swept the shelves with my eyes, but I couldn't find what I was looking for.

Today I have to go to the grocery store to shop some goods.

"Ah! There it is!" Finally I spotted the instant food I was looking for.

I reached up to grab the box on the top shelf.

Uh-oh… I'm too short I couldn't reach it. Why do they have to put it so high up there??

I tip-toed and stretched myself trying to reach the natto box… almost got it…

Suddenly a hand from behind me grabbed the box. I was very surprised I almost tripped.

"Here…" the hand owner handed me the box.

"Rukawa-kun!" I blushed a bit surprised to see him in this grocery store.

Rukawa-kun took another box and put it in his own shopping basket.

"Shopping?" I asked him.

"Yes." He walked to another shelf and picked up a box of cereal.

Silly me, I should've not asked that. Off course he's shopping!

"Do you usually shop here?" I decided to follow him.

"Yes."

"Me too! Funny that we never met!"

He didn't reply and walked to the spot where they put jam and jelly.

Do you like peanut butter?" I asked that as I saw him took a jar of chunky peanut butter.

"Yes."

"Me too… Don't you wanna get your self a jar of jelly? Peanut butter and jelly go well together, you know," I said cheerfully.

"I don't like jelly."

"Oh! Gomen, I didn't know that."

Rukawa-kun reached to grab a small jar of chocolate spread.

"Do you usually have that brand?" I asked him again.

"Yes."

I noticed that he looked annoyed. But I encouraged my self to keep on following him. This kind of opportunity doesn't come along everyday.

"Why don't you try this brand?" I took other chocolate spread from the shelf, "It's better than that one," I pointed the choco spread jar in his hand, "Trust me, I know," I smiled in a very friendly way.

Rukawa-kun stared at me, then at the jar in my hand.

I was really surprised when he took the choco spread from his basket and put it back to its place, and then received the jar I handed him.

"Thank you," he said without looking at me and walked to another rack.

I was bursting in joy. My face felt warm. It must've gone red.

Suddenly I remembered I forgot to say thank you when he helped me with the natto before.

"Rukawa-kun! Thank you to you too!"

"What?" he turned his face to see me.

"The natto…"

"No problem." He answered before I even finished talking.

Then he walked to the cashier to pay his groceries. I've finished my shopping too, so I went there right behind him.

Outside the grocery store, Rukawa-kun quickly got on his bike and was ready to go.

I got near him.

"Rukawa-kun, see you tomorrow at school," I gave him my best smile.

"Yes," he answered in a flat tone.

Then he ride his bike away. I stared at him until he was out of my sight. 

I smiled inside.

Rukawa-kun… I've always believed that good things--no matter how small they are--always come our way everyday. And now I believe it more.

TO BE CONTINUED

**Crusty's**** end note: Thanx guys for sending me your reviews. (I accept anonymous reviews! Onegai, send them in!) **

I've always thought that RuHaru pairing will never earned a lot of attention (hey they always crazy for shonen-ai pairings aren't they?)

Oh yeah… please kindly spare your time to read my other fics (titled 'Graduation Day' and 'If I let You Go') I need feedbacks abt them because sometimes I think the last mentioned is too girly f(^ ^)' 


	4. Thank You

**Disclaimer: I don't own Slam Dunk, it's Takehiko-sensei's.**

**Crusty's note:** Sorry it took me so long to update, I've been busy--and sleepy ^ ^' 

                     Thanx for your reviews guys, right now I'm not planning to make a multiple pov for this fiction, but just wait and see how it's gonna turned out.

**Thank You**

Today, as usual, I was watching the Shohoku-team's after school practise. And as usual too, the practise ended at night. I decided to wait for my brother so we could go home together.

"Haruko! How was I doing?" Sakuragi-kun came to me with a very merry face

"You were doing good. You've improved day after day, Sakuragi-kun!" I told him what was exactly on my mind. Sakuragi-kun indeed always shows improvement in his basketball skills day after day.

"Sou ka? Nyahahaha!" he laughed so happily. He looked like a little kid if he does so.

"Sakuragi! What are you doing!? Mop the court right now!!"

"Gori!? Can't you see I was talking to Haruko?"

"Shut up and mop the court! NOW!!"

Sakuragi-kun grumbled, but he walked to grab a mop.

I shifted my vision to the person who was already moping the court.

Rukawa-kun.

Suddenly in one moment his eyes met mine. I blushed. It was just a quick scene and he was already concentrating in moping again. 

Everyone, except for the 1st graders who were still cleaning the court, was ready to go home.

"Let's go, Haruko," my brother nodded to me.

I was supposed to go home now, but I wished not to because I wanted to stay more to viewed and somewhat accompanied Rukawa-kun.

Reluctantly I followed my brother who was already walking away a little bit far ahead me.

"Haruko…"

I was very surprised to find a voice called my name. It's not because no one ever called me before, but because that voice--even though I hear it very seldom--was the voice of someone that I care for so much.

"R-Rukawa-kun? What is it?" my voice sounded shaking since I was nervous.

Instead of saying a word, Rukawa-kun said nothing and just stared at me.

"Thank you," he said finally.

"Thank you? For what?"

"The chocolate spread. It was good, I like it," he spoke in a flat tone.

I widened my eyes feeling happy. "Your welcome! I told you it was good!" a wide smile appeared on my face.

"Ja…" he ended our conversation and turned. Then he was back in cleaning the court.

I saw Sakuragi-kun came up to him, but I didn't pay any attention to what they were doing or talking about. I was drowning in joy. I've never dreamt before that Rukawa-kun would come to me or call my name or even start a conversation with me.

"Haruko!" suddenly I heard my brother called me.

"Yes! I'm coming!" I turned to the hall, "See you tomorrow Rukawa-kun, Sakuragi-kun!" Then I ran to my brother.

"Wait, Haruko!"

"Later, Sakuragi-kun!"

"But…but…"

----------------------------------

"What's with that smile?" my brother asked me as we walked to the station.

"Oh…nothing. Nothing at all," I smiled cheerfully.

"Something nice has happened to you?" he smiled too but looked curious. 

"Yes! But I won't tell you!"

"You munchkin…" he patted my head and smiled in a brotherly way.

I wished to tell my brother about what had just happened in the hall before. But I'm too shy, so I just keep it to myself.

Rukawa-kun, it always seemed impossible to reach for you. But now I guess I've found a way.

Why I've never thought of that before?

TO BE CONTINUED


	5. Back To Zero

**Disclaimer: I don't own Slam Dunk; it's Takehiko-sensei's**

Back To Zero 

It was lunchtime break. I dashed myself to a classroom. Above the doors there was a board written '1-10'.

Some students came out of that classroom to have lunch. Some brought their lunchboxes and I supposed some just find their way to the cafeteria.

I peaked inside and spotted what I was looking for.

"Rukawa-kun," I got near his desk.

Rukawa-kun lifted up his face. His face looked like as if he was just waking up from a sleep. Was he sleeping?

"What?" he sounded annoyed. He scratched his head a bit. Now I'm sure he had just awaken right before I called him.

"Here…it's for you," I handed him a lunchbox. He stared at it and looked confused.

"I made it this morning. Here, take it," I spoke again smiling.

"Why should I?" he said carelessly.

I got speechless for a while. I didn't predict he would say that.

"Umm... because I thought you would like it. It's chocolate spread sandwiches," I smiled to convince him to receive the lunchbox.

Rukawa was silent.

"No, thanks. I had that this morning," then he got up from his chair and walked to the door clutching his sport bag.

"But...Wait, Rukawa-kun…"

I was about to chase him, but suddenly some girls stood on my way.

"You heard what he said. He didn't want it," one of the girl spoke.

"Yea…take your offerings back and get out of here," another girl pointed at the door.

I supposed they were the Rukawa-shinetai.

I walked out of the classroom in silent. I was very disappointed.

Yesterday Rukawa-kun said that he likes the chocolate spread, so I made these sandwiches in order to earn his attention.

I thought this was a good idea, but it wasn't.

The happiness that bloomed yesterday night at the basketball hall was still blooming when I woke up this morning. But now that sweet feeling has swept away.

Rukawa-kun's rejection really made me hit the ground.

I can't understand why he was so bitter. Was he really that kind of person? Or was there any problem that's bothering him?

Rukawa-kun…I wish I could understand you…

TO BE CONTINUED


	6. Whose Sandwiches It Was?

**Disclaimer: I don't own Slam Dunk, it's Takehiko-sensei's**

**Whose Sandwiches It Was?**

Even though Rukawa-kun refused the sandwiches I offered him, but still I attended the Shohoku team's practice during the lunch break.

"You haven't eaten your lunch, Haruko?" Yumi, one of my best friends who always accompany me to watch the practice, asked me as she saw the lunch box in my hand.

"Uh…no, this isn't my lunch."

"Is it your brother's?" Aki, another best friend of mine, asked me too.

"Uhmm…"

"Haruko! Is that for me?" a voice of a man suddenly startled me.

Sakuragi-kun approached us with a smile.

"Ah..Sakuragi-kun. Well… actually I was kinda felt making sandwiches this morning. That's all" Yes, I lied.

"But if you want it, you can have it," I smiled and handed him the box.

"Yaay!! Haruko brought me lunch!" he shouted cheerfully.

Yumi pulled me to her side and whispered, "Haruko! Are you sure about giving him the lunch? You're not suddenly in love with him, are you?"

"No, Yumi! He's a good friend of mine. I don't see there's anything wrong with giving him sandwiches!" I whispered too so Sakuragi-kun couldn't hear what we were talking about.

"Sakuragi!! Who permit you to eat!? We're practicing now!!" my brother shouted furiously.

He got near Sakuragi-kun and gave him a couple of his famous 'Gori Punch'--so they were called.

"Ouch! Don't be jealous just because your sister brought me lunch! Didn't she make you any sandwiches too?"

"Shut up!! Get back there and put those sandwiches away! It's not time to rest and eat yet!"

Sakuragi-kun grumbled, but before he got back to his teammates he turned to me.

"Arigato, Haruko-chan! These sandwiches are very delicious, I can't wait to eat all of them after practicing, Jya!"

"Hurry up, Sakuragi! And don't call my sister Haruko-chan!!"

"Chill out, Gori! I'm coming!"

I smiled as I observed Sakuragi-kun. He was very merry as he always does.

Suddenly I caught someone was observing me too.

Rukawa-kun.

But he turned around as our eyes met.

Uh-oh…what was he thinking?

Maybe he thought I wasn't serious in offering him the sandwiches before, because I easily gave it to Sakuragi-kun.

Oh-no…

"Haruko!" Aki's voice startled me, "Let's get back to the class. Lunch break is almost over."

"Umm…OK."

Before leaving, I glanced at Rukawa-kun once more. He was doing his lay-ups.

Rukawa-kun…what were you thinking about?

Or were you didn't care at all?

**TO BE CONTINUED**

**Crusty's**** endnote: As you see, Haruko's best friends appeared in this chapter. Since I never get their names, so I just gave them the name 'Yumi' and 'Aki'. Yumi is the girl with the pony tails and Aki is the girl with the short boyish hair.**


	7. Seriously, Whose Sandwiches It Was?

**Disclaimer: I don't own Slam Dunk, it's Takehiko-sensei's.**

**Crusty's**** note: Thanks to anime-luverjc who told me the names of haruko's friends. But due consistency, I guess I'll use my version of their names. No offense 'kay, Tkehiko-sensei! Hehehe…They're still yours all the way. ^ ^**

**Seriously, Whose Sandwiches It Was?**

"Are you sure you wanna go home now?" Yumi asked me as we were about to school.

"Yes. Today I felt like going straight home."

"You don't want to watch the basketball team practicing?" Aki asked me too.

"No… I wanna go home, do my homeworks, and sleep. I'm tired," I smiled as I said that.

"This isn't like you Haruko," Yumi gave me a suspicious stare.

"Yumi's right! You never wanna miss watching Rukawa practicing," Aki sounded a bit concern rather than suspicious.

"Aww! Come on! It's nothing, really! I just felt like going home now!" I walked faster leaving them behind. Inside, I begged them not to ask more questions.

"OK, OK, we're sorry. Let's go home now," Yumi caught me by the hand. I guess she felt guilty.

Then we walked to the school gate.

-------------------------------------------

In my room, I sighed almost a thousand of time.

I didn't want to watch the basketball team practice because of the 'sandwich incident'. 

I still couldn't forget  when Rukawa-kun looked at me at the basketball hall today.

Maybe it was nothing, but somehow I was worried about how he would think about me.

'I made it this morning, it's for you, yeah-right' maybe that what he thought.

Haruko, how could you be so clumsy?

But I can't say no if Sakuragi-kun wanted those sandwiches. After all, Rukawa-kun didn't want then anyway.

Suddenly someone knocked my door.

"Haruko, there's a phone for you," I heard my mom.

"Okay, mom, "Then I went downstairs.

I picked up the phone. Perhaps it's Yumi or Aki.

"Moshi-moshi."

"Moshi-moshi, "it was a man's voice.

"Who am I speaking to?"

"……..Rukawa."

I got stiffen, "W-who?"

"Rukawa. Rukawa Kaede."

I got stiffen more. It was him alright!

"Ah, R-Rukawa-kun. What is it?" I snapped my self before he decided to hang up the phone.

"….Thank you..."

"Huh?"

"Thank you for brought me sandwiches."

"Huh?" Don't say 'huh' twice, Haruko!

"Though I said I didn't want it, that doesn't mean I hate chocolate spread sandwich. So… thank you."

I don't understand what he just said. He didn't tasted it a bit, why should he thank me for?

"Ano…" I heard him again, "It was for me wasn't it?"

"Huh?" Don't say 'huh' thrice!!

"Nevermind. Jya…"

"Wait, Rukawa-kun!!"

"….."

"Rukawa-kun?"

"What?"

Phew! He hasn't hanged up the phone.

"Umm… umm… you're-you're welcome…" I can't find another word to say.

"Hai. Jya."

*click*

Even though I heard he hung up, but I still held the phone to my ear.

Rukawa-kun called me…

He called me.

HE CALLED ME!!!

Yaaay!! I threw the phone up high.

"What is it, Haruko?" my brother showed up. He must be surprised to hear me yelled

"Nothing nii-chan!"

Still felt happy, I gave him a quick hug and dashed upstairs to my room.

I hugged my pillow tight and smiled as I never had.

Rukawa-kun called me! This must be a miracle!

And he thanked me for the sandwiches that he didn't taste a bit!

"Waitaminit," I put my finger on my lips to silence myself.

If I'm not mistaken, he asked me whether those sandwiches were really for him or not.

It means...he cares!

He cares whether those sandwiches were really for him.

He cares when he saw Sakuragi-kun took and ate them.

He cares when I said it was for him!

"Rukawa-kuu~~n!" I hugged my pillow tighter and smiled wider.

I bet I couldn't sleep the whole night. I'm too happy to sleep!

Finally I decided to call Yumi and Aki to tell them the happy news.

Rukawa-kun, you might look bitter, but now I'm sure you're not that kind of person.

*tbc*


	8. Something In Return

**Disclaimer: I don't own Slam Dunk, it's Takehiko-sensei's.**

**Something In Return**

The sun was shining softly, the weather was perfect, and my mood was swimming around on seventh heaven.

I entered my class room with joy that I think no one could ever break.

Rukawa-kun's phone call last night made everything look prettier than they were before.

I also learned that I have to be easy in trying to catch his attention.

Routine smiles and greetings are about enough to make him notices my presence. Lunches and other blah-blah sugar and spice things must be kept in the closet for a moment.

"Haruko-chan!" I saw Sakuragi-kun approached my desk.

"Ohayou, Sakuragi-kun."

"Ohayou! Haruko-chan, the sandwiches you gave yesterday were great! They were very delicious!" Sakuragi-kun grinned.

"Thank you. I'm glad you like it."

"But that stupid obese took some of them…" he murmured.

"Takamiya?"

"Yes. Anyway, I was wondering, umm…do you bring any lunch for me again today?"

"Uh, sorry I don't"

"Well, that's OK…"Sakuragi-kun looked disappointed.

"But I can bring you some tomorrow if you like," I quickly spoke to cheer him up.

"Really?"

"Sure," I smiled.

"Thank you, Haruko-chan!' Sakuragi-kun smiled widely, "Actually, today, I brought you some shrimprolls. I made it in return for the sandwiches. Well, not all of them I made. Most are my mother's homemade. I guess cooking is not my kind of thing. So I just mix it with my mother's. Mine might taste a bit awful, but my mother's are very delicious. So, here you go."

Sakuragi-kun handed me a lunch box wrapped in a red scarf. As red as his face (and hair) right now.

I laughed a little to see his shy face, "Thank you very much, Sakuragi-kun!"

"You're welcome. Well, see you later, okay?" he waved and left my class room, still blushing.

I smiled. Sakuragi-kun is actually a sweet person. He's not nasty like everyone use to say. He's a good friend anyone could have.

-------------------------------

After math, I went to the women's room. I was a little hurry because Mrs. Yamada's history class starts after the math class.

Ah! Suddenly my heart was thumping to see a figure walking towards me.

"Ohayou, Rukawa-kun," I greeted that figure as he got near me.

Rukawa-kun stopped, "…………Ohayou."

I smiled and bowed a bit passing him with my heart stil thumping. When I was only taking few steps, suddenly…

"………..Haruko…"

I stopped my feet.

"Y-yes?" I slightly turned to Rukawa-kun. Oh-god…now my heart was beating rapidly.

Rukawa-kun approached me and took out something from his pocket.

"Here…" he handed me a candy bar.

"F-for me?"

"Yes, in return for the sandwiches."

I couldn't believe my ears. I just stared at Rukawa-kun and he candy bar in his hand.

"Uh… thank-thank you…" I slowly received the candy bar. I could see my hand was shaking as I took it.

"Jya…" Rukawa-kun turned and walked away leaving me standing in disbelieve.

Suddenly I felt something warm on the corner of my eyes.

Tears.

Quickly I wiped it before it flows down on my cheeks.

Kami-sama…If this just a dream, please don't wake me up.

I held the candy bar with both of my hands and brought it to my chest with tenderness as if I'm holding a little baby.

I haven't tasted this candy bar yet, but I bet this is the sweetest candy bar in the world…

Rukawa-kun, arigato…

TO BE CONTINUED


	9. Need Your Help

**Disclaimer: I don't own Slam Dunk, it's Takehiko-sensei's.**

**Crusty's**** note: **Some of you might wonder about the sweet Rukawa-kun, but actually there are some hints on the other previous chapters why he acted so. Well, I guess this fic is a little slow, but actually, if you guys haven't notice, I've been trying to build an intrigue starting from sixth chapter. I hope I could pace this fic up in a proper way.

**Need Your Help**

Lunch break.

Me, Yumi, and Aki were sitting in cicle on grass, eating our lunch.

"Do you want to taste this, girls?" I opened the lunch box Sakuragi-kun gave me. The smell of shrimprolls popped out of the box.

"Wow! Itadakimasu!" Yumi quickly put a shrimproll in her mouth using chopsticks.

"It's yummy! You're really good at cooking!" Aki already chewing some too.

"Actually Sakuragi-kun made those."

"What!?" Yumi and Aki shouted almost at the same time.

"That.that barbarian made this?"

"Well, only some of them. Most are his mother's homemade."

"Aki, I think we ate his mother's. Thank god."

"Why did you say that, Yumi?" I asked.

"Because it was delicious! I bet the one he made tasted awful."

"Hmm." I'm a little bit disagree even though I haven't taste it.

I took a shrimproll, "Let see then..."

"Haruko, don't! What if the one you took is his!" Aki looked very anxious.

"Come on girls. Don't be overreacted. I don't think it's gonna be that bad."

"I don't like this. Eating his lunch is like taking part in Russian Roulette," Yumi mumbled.

Quickly I dumped the shrimproll in to my mouth.

Chew-chew-chew.

"..."

"Well, Haruko?" Aki whispered.

"Haruko?" Yumi narrowed her eyes.

"Ssaltyy~~!!"

Aki sighed, "I told you."

-------------------------------

After lunch, me and the two girls quickly went to the basketball.

I can't wait to see Rukawa-kun. I wonder how his expression's gonna be when he saw me. Well, he gave me a candy bar, so I guess I can expect some thing nice would happen.

The basketball team members were very busy as usual. Physical exercises, simulation match, etc.

"Haruko-chan!" Sakuragi-kun waved to me. I smiled and waved back.

Meanwhile, Rukawa-kun was fully concentrating to the practice as usual.

"Sakuragi!!"

"I know, I know, Gori. Focus, right?" Sakuragi-kun smirked.

After my brother told his team to take a quick break, Sakuragi-kun got near me.

"Haruko-chan, have you eaten my shrimprolls?" he looked very excited.

"Yes," I smiled.

"Well?"

"It was salt-" quickly I put my hand on Yumi's mouth.

"It was good, Sakuragi-kun, really!" I tried to look sincere.

"Sou ka? I'll bring you more tomorrow!"

"Uh, don't bother, Sakuragi-kun. Today was just enough, thank you."

"More than enough." Yumi mumbled.

"Oh, okay!"

"Break's over, men!" suddenly I heard my brother, "Continue our practice! Sakuragi, you too!"

"Just a minute, Gori!"

"Now!!" my brother shouted again.

"I said just a."

"Get back there, do aho," suddenly Rukawa-kun appeared behind him.

"Kitsune! Don't you dare."

"I think you should go back practicing, Sakuragi-kun." I told him slowly. I don't want my brother to scold him.

"I f you said so." then he went to his teammates followed by Rukawa-kun.

"Hmm.once a barbarian will always be a barbarian." Yumi crossed her arms.

"Yumi."

"Let's go, Haruko," Yumi and Aki left the hall. Hesitantly I followed them.

"Haruko, wait."

"Huh?" I turned around. 

It's Rukawa-kun!

"Ah, R-Rukawa-kun? You should go back practicing, my brother might be mad at you." I said nervously.

"Are you busy tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow? Uh...well, tomorrow is Sunday, and I got no plan."

"Good. I need your help."

"M-my help?"

"Rukawaa~~!! What are you doing there!!?" I jeard my brother roared.

"Huh!? Kitsune! Stay away from Haruko-chan!!" Sakuragi-kun quickly approached us.

"I'll call you later," Rukawa-kun turned to join his teammates.

"Kitsune! What did you say to her!?"

"None of your business."

"Teme..!!"

"Sakuragi! Rukawa! Get back here, you idiots!!"

My brother gave them his 'Gori punch', meanwhile I was standing still, speechless.

Wanna meet me on Sunday? Need my help? Call me later?

Rukawa-kun, this doesn't seem like you. But lately things are doing nice.

So.I guess I'll take this chance.

**TO BE CONTINUED**

**Crusty's**** commercial break: ***merry tunes* Are you enjoying this fic? Are you curious about other fics I wrote? I you are, just click on my pen name and check out my bio to know other fics I wrote. Please do read them out and don't forget to drop your reviews to let me know how I am doing on those fics. Remember, just click on my pen name. It's c-r-u-s-t-y b-u-b-b-l-e-h-e-a-d. *merry tunes*


	10. Sweet on The Heart

**Disclaimer: I don't own Slam Dunk, it's Takehiko-sensei's**

**Sweet on The Heart**

I checked myself on my mirror for perhaps a thousand of times.

Today's Sunday, and Rukawa-kun is going to come to my house.

Last night he called me. He said that he's failing on math and he needs my help to teach him some. So, this morning he'll come to my house.

Actually, I don't understand why he asked me for the favor. But he said my brother once said that I'm good at math, so he thought it's the right choice to ask some help from me.

Last night phone call was the longest conversation I ever had with Rukawa-kun, even though it was only about six minutes.

He spoke in a monotone as usual, but I'm still happy to be able to chat with him longer than just a few words.

*pin-poo~n*

I heard the door bell.

"I'll get that!" I dashed to the front door.

----------------------------

"Ohayou, Rukawa-kun," I greeted him cheerfully as I opened the door.

"Ohayou."

"Please come in."

"Where's captain?" Rukawa-kun asked as we sat.

"He went to my relative's with my dad. Well, which part you want to discuss first?" I opened my text book.

Rukawa-kun opened his text book too. Then we went on with our lesson that day.

"I don't understand why you're failing on math," I spoke as we took a break, "Because you quickly understand what I explained to you."

"Maybe it's because I always sleeps in class," he sipped his tea.

"Really?" Why didn't know that?

"Yes."

"Maybe you're bored, am I right?"

"Maybe."

"But.you're not sleeping this time. Why?"

"....I don't know."

Hmm.my guess is Rukawa-kun is the type of person who needs a private tutoring. I guess he'll easily bored if he's not tutored personally.

"Ano." he put down his cup.

"What?'

"Do you like the candy bar?"

"Huh?"

"....Do you-."

"Y-yes! I like it!" I quickly smiled. Actually the candy bar still remains uneaten. I kept it in my drawer as if it's a souvenir.

"Actually." Rukawa-kun said again, "I didn't plan to give that to you that day."

Oh.

"But when I saw you, I guess I have to show my appreciation. And that candy bar is the only thing I got in my pocket that time."

Oh.

"I hope you didn't get me wrong."

Oh.

"Did you?"

"Not at all. I know you just want to say thank you," I smiled. But it hurts inside.

"Anyway, yesterday Sakuragi was talking about shrimprolls. You.brought him lunch?"

"Huh? Uh, no. He brought me."

"He did?"

"Yeah.it was a little bit salty, but the thought that counts," I smiled remembering how 'a little bit salty' it was.

"He's good in nothing," Rukawa-kun sighed.

"Well, it was salty on the tongue, but it was sweet on the heart," I mumbled.

"....I guess I'm pretty good at shrimprolls."

"You are?" I widened my eyes.

"Maybe so-so."

"Maybe you could teach Sakuragi-kun to make some," I laughed a little.

"Maybe I could bring you some."

"Huh?"

"I guess-.a candy bar isn't worthy to your sandwiches. I'll bring you some shrimprolls tomorrow."

"B-but you don't have to.I mean.you didn't even taste the sandwiches. So.you don't have to bother.I mean.it was for you, but I gave it to Sakuragi-kun.so,,,"

"The thought that counts."

Suddenly I blushed. Rukawa-kun stared at me with a flat expression, but I blushed heavily just by staring back at his beautiful eyes.

"The-the candy bar you gave me was sweet on the heart too, Rukawa-kun. So.so you don't have to.I-I can see that you're sincere.Really."

Rukawa-kun said nothing and just looked at me, "Okay then." he said finally.

"So, shall we continue?" I flipped the pages of my text boo nervously.

Then we continued our lesson.

While explaining to Rukawa-kun, sometimes I glanced at him heartfully.

I was hopeless for a moment. But now I can see another hope.

Rukawa-kun, I've tasted a sweet flavor on the tip of my senses, and I'm pretty sure I'll be able to taste the rest of it on my heart.

**TO BE CONTINUED**


	11. Invitation

**Disclaimer: I don't own Slam Dunk. It belongs to Takehiko-sensei.**

****

****

****

**Crusty's**** note:** He-he…

****

**Invitation**

****

****

****

That morning I was walking entering the school gate.

"Haruko-chan!"

I turned. Sakuragi-kun was running approaching me.

"Ohayou, Haruko-chan," he panted.

"Ohayou. What's with the rush, Sakuragi-kun?"

"Uh…" he scratched his head, "I got an extra ticket to the Blue Hearts concert tomorrow. Maybe you'd wanna go with me?"

I was rather surprised, but Blue Hearts happens to be one of my favorite bands, so I think I'll just receive his invitation. "Sure. I'd love to."

"Really!?" Sakuragi-kun's eyes were sparkling. He looked so funny. "What do you say if I pick you up at seven?"

"Sure," I smiled.

"Yaay!!" Sakuragi-kun automatically raised his hands up. Some of the students at the school yard were staring at us, but I don't mind. Sakuragi-kun is always like this, very spontaneous and cheerful.

-------------

"Whaat!? You're going to a concert with him!?" Yumi seemed pretty shocked when I told her about my plan with Sakuragi-kun. I don't understand why it was such a big deal.

"Are you sure, Haruko?" Aki looked rather confused and somewhat worried.

"Of course I'm sure. It's Blue Hearts! Why I should not be sure?"

"It's not about the Blue Hearts," Yumi sighed, "It's about with who you're going to the concert."

"What's with Sakuragi-kun?"

"Haruko…" Yumi sighed again, "Even I cannot imagine what he's going to do with you…"

"Stop saying that!" I stood up from my chair, "Both of you talk like he's some kind of nasty person. He's not! You just don't know him!"

Yumi and Aki looked very surprised to see my reaction. But I think they really should listen to me and change their opinion about Sakuragi-kun.

"Ha-Haruko… we didn't mean that. We were just worrying…" Aki said carefully.

"That's right, please don't be mad at us," Yumi reached my hand and try to motion me to sit down again.

"I understand girls," I sat back on my chair, "But Sakuragi-kun is really a nice person. He may seem a short temper, but he's actually nice. You've seen him when he was playing basketball with the rest of the team during the matches, right? His spirit showed how he actually is."

Yumi and Aki said nothing. They still seemed disagree, but I know they listened to what I said. Maybe my words would be able to change their opinion about Sakuragi-kun.

"Okay, Haruko," Yumi said, "We trust you. Just... take care of yourself there, okay?"

"Don't do anything stupid," Aki pointed at me.

I smiled, "Thanks girls…"

----------------

When I was walking down the corridor, someone called me from behind.

"Haruko…" Rukawa-kun was standing there. His voice was rather soft as if he didn't want anyone to hear him.

"Yes?" I held my smile because I don't want to look I was grinning.

"Can I ask for another favor about the tutoring?"

"Sure!" Certainly!

"How about tomorrow? Is that fine with you?"

"Ah… I… can't…" I was speaking hesitantly, between wanting to say yes and to say no.

I thought I saw Rukawa-kun slightly raised his brows. "Oh, is that so. How about the day after tomorrow?"

"Sure!" I said quickly.

"Well, okay…" Rukawa-kun turned and left.

I sighed. Well, the day after tomorrow is still fine even though I want to be with him earlier.

I turned and went to my class room.

"Haruko…"

I quickly turned back. Surprisingly Rukawa-kun was still there.

"Yes? What is it, Rukawa-kun?"

He said nothing for a while, but then he spoke in his usual monotone voice, "This is really none of my business, but do you have any plan for tomorrow?"

I was speechless for a while wondering why he asked that. But then I assumed he asked that because I said I can't tutor him tomorrow.

"Um, yes… I got a plan to go out for tomorrow," I said rather soft.

Silence for some moment. Rukawa-kun seemed like wanting to say something. I always enjoying my time to be with Rukawa-kun even just for some minutes, but right now I felt an awkwardness that I want to avoid.

"Uh… well, I should go back to my class," I smiled and ready to leave.

"With who?"

"Ah?" I slightly turned to face him.

"You got a plan for tomorrow… with whom you're going?"

"A friend." It shouldn't be hard to mention Sakuragi-kun's name, but why I felt very reluctant to say it? What am I trying to avoid?

"Do I… know him?" Rukawa-kun was still speaking in a flat tone, but this time it was somewhat sounded careful.

"No. You don't know him." I bit my lips after saying that. I don't know if Rukawa-kun noticed it.

"Oh. Sorry that I asked too much. This is really none of my business. Gomen."

"It's okay…"

Then Rukawa-kun left. I was still standing where I was.

How could I be so mean? Why did I say Rukawa-kun doesn't know Sakuragi-kun? Of course he does!

I felt guilty to Sakuragi-kun. But at that moment, I really didn't want Rukawa-kun to know that I was going to go to the concert with Sakuragi-kun. In fact, I don't want Rukawa-kun to know if I was going to go out with any boys.

What was I trying to avoid? Was I avoiding making him jealous? But why should he? Who am I to him that knowing I'm going out with some guy would make him jealous?

But other than that, I've lied to him…

Rukawa-kun, I'm sorry…

**TO BE CONTINUED**

****

**Crusty's**** endnote: **I don't know if the band Blue Hearts ever exists (maybe they do), but I like the name, so I just put it in my fic with no meant of taking any advantages.


	12. About Honesty

**Disclaimer: I don't own Slam Dunk. It belongs to Takehiko-sensei.**

**About Honesty**

It was nearly seven pm. I was sitting in front of the TV with my brother even though I wasn't watching any TV shows. Actually I was waiting for Sakuragi-kun to pick me up because we're going to a concert.

I could tell that Nii-chan was glancing at me sometimes, but I pretended I didn't notice it.

When he heard that I'm going to the concert with Sakuragi-kun, he looked like disliking the plan, just like Yumi and Aki. But I know it was just a protecting habit that every brother would have to their sisters.

I heard the door bell rang. Nii-chan quickly stood up and went to the door before I did. I smiled and followed behind him.

When Nii-chan opened the door, Sakuragi-kun appeared before him. He seemed rather surprised to see Nii-chan, but then he grinned to see my big brother.

"Konbanwa, Gori… I mean, captain."

"It's very unusual that you called me captain."

"Oh please don't say that! It's a must for me to call you that. Or you want me to call you Onii-san?"

"No!" Nii-chan replied quickly. I chuckled.

"We're leaving now, Nii-chan," I smiled to him and kissed him lightly on the cheek.

"I promise I'll take a good care of her, Nii-chan."

"Don't call me Nii-chan, Sakuragi!!" My brother seemed snapped out. Then we left after waving to him.

When we arrived at the concert area, it was crowded already.

The air was actually cold, but it felt kinda hot because there were so many people.

"The concert will be started in a moment," Sakuragi-kun said to me.

"Yes. Anyway, Sakuragi-kun, I'm very thankful that you asked me to go to this concert. I like Blue hearts a lot."

"Really? I didn't know you like them. Well, this must be a sign that we're actually two of a kind, Ha-ha…" Sakuragi-kun laughed but he also seemed shy at the time. I just smiled to see him like so.

The people were making a line to enter the gate of the building where the concert will be held. I was chatting with Sakuragi-kun when I saw someone standing outside the line among some other people.

The light was dim but I was able to recognize the person. And my heart thumped for a reason I don't understand.

"Haruko-chan? What is it?" Apparently Sakuragi-kun noticed that I was nervous.

"Uh, no… nothing," I tried to smile, but seeing Sakuragi-kun's expression, my smile must be very unconvincing.

"Are you sick?"

"No, I'm fine. Really…" I turned and tried to hide behind Sakuragi-kun. I swear I could see Rukawa-kun was standing not too far away from us. Suddenly I wish I was invisible.

"You must be cold. Here. Take my coat," Sakuragi-kun took off his coat and placed it around me.

"No, Sakuragi-kun. I'm fine." I pushed off his coat and his hands slowly. I don't want to make him feel bad. But I also don't want to look like that me and him are…

I glanced to a certain direction from the corner of my eyes.

He wasn't there no more.

I started to think that I'm seeing things. Why would Rukawa-kun be here, anyway? He wouldn't waste his time just by watching a line of people who want to see a concert.

But still, I was in between sure and unsure. For some seconds ago, I really saw Rukawa-kun standing there. He was staring straightly at me. And I didn't know how to explain the kind of stare he was giving me.

Carefully I looked around trying to find him among other people.

No, he really wasn't here. Slowly I sighed in relieve. I must be really dreaming. After convincing myself that I was, I started to feel more relax and chattering cheerfully with Sakuragi-kun.

The line was moving approaching the gate. I quickly entered it when I and Sakuragi-kun were in front of it.

Yes, this is a wonderful night. I could watch the concert of one of my favorite band. I shouldn't feel anything but excited.

The concert ended not too late. I and Sakuragi-kun decided to drop by at a café before we went home.

"The concert was great, wasn't it?" Sakuragi-kun said.

"Yes. They were excellent."

"Is this mean you're willing to go out with me for the next time?"

"Maybe!" I answered cheerfully.

"Really? He-he…" Sakuragi-kun grinned a bit shyly when he heard my reply.

Yes, maybe I'd go with Sakuragi-kun if on the next time he asked me again. It was really fun to hang out with him. Or maybe I'll ask him on the next time.

"I wonder what the boys will say if they knew I'm going out with you," Sakuragi-kun said again.

"Who?"

"Mito and the rest of the guys."

"You didn't tell them?"

Sakuragi-kun crossed his arms, "Nope! I'm sure they'll mess up if I did. They could be spying on us."

"That would be impossible, Sakuragi-kun." I laughed.

"You don't know them. They can be very horrific sometimes. Well, but of course they'll never be able to defeat me."

"But you're going to tell them later, right? I mean, they're your bestfriends."

"Of course I will. That would also be the chance to mock them. He-he-he…"

I chuckled. Then I leaned forward with my hands cupping my chin, "Am I your friend too, Sakuragi-kun?"

"What?" Sakuragi-kun was somewhat looked surprised. "Uh, well… friend? Well… I think you're more than that…"

"You mean I'm your bestfriend?"

"Uh…"

"Thank you!" I smiled cheerfully.

Sakuragi-kun grinned and scratched his head.

"Oh! It's very late, I have to go home now," I looked at my wristwatch.

"Okay." Sakuragi-kun stood up from his chair. Then we left the café.

Along the walk to my house, I talked about the concert happily. Sakuragi-kun was rather quiet that time. He only said a few lines and sometimes laughed with me.

"Thank you very much, Sakuragi-kun," I said when we arrived in front of my house, "I'm having a very wonderful night."

"You're welcome. I'm having a great time too," he smiled.

"Well, goodnight."

"Goodnight."

I entered my house, but then Sakuragi-kun called me again.

"Haruko-chan!"

"Yes?"

"I… I…" Sakuragi-kun seemed very hesitant. His face was also blushing.

"What is it, Sakuragi-kun? You don't feel well?" I was worrying his red face. He might have fever.

"Uh… It's not that… What I want to say is…"

Sakuragi-kun was still standing in front of me when the front door opened. My brother showed up. "Haruko? Don't you think it's kinda late?"

"Oh, I'm sorry Nii-chan. We went to the café after the concert. And I didn't pay attention to the time."

"Hmm…" Nii-chan narrowed his eyes at Sakuragi-kun. "Sakuragi? You didn't do anything funny, did you?"

"What? Where do you have those thoughts? Of course I didn't! I'm a very respectable man, Gori."

"Well, okay then. Thanks for walking Haruko home. Goodnight," My brother motioned me to come in and ready to close the door.

"Goodnight, Sakuragi-kun," I smiled to him.

"Wait! I mean… Gori, can I talk to her for a while?"

"Hmmm… Okay…" even though Nii-chan seemed reluctant, but he went inside and left the two of us alone.

"What is it that you want to talk about, Sakuragi-kun?" I thought it must be something very important.

"Haruko-chan, I… Like I said before at the café… to me, you are more than just a friend… and also more than a bestfriend…"

I kind of lost to what he was about to say.

That's when another person showed up in front of my house.

"Rukawa-kun?" I mumbled in rather disbelieved. What is he doing here this late?

Sakuragi-kun turned to see the person behind him. "What are you doing here?" he asked the question I want to ask too

"I'm here to meet captain. I got an appointment with him."

"Why would you wanna meet him this late?" Sakuragi-kun's voice got a bit high. "I bet that's just a reason you made up. I know you must be following us, right?"

"Why would I do that?" Rukawa-kun replied calmly.

Suddenly I remembered that I thought I saw Rukawa-kun at the concert area before. Could it be what Sakuragi-kun said was right?

"Well, if you want to meet Gori, go ahead and walk in. You interrupted our conversation," Sakuragi-kun snorted.

Without saying a word, Rukawa-kun straightly went to the door. He passed me and entered my house. I really wished he would say something to me.

"Uh… I'm sorry, Haruko-chan… I didn't mean to make some noise," Sakuragi-kun said apologetically.

"It's okay, Sakuragi-kun… so where were we?" I tried to smile, but my thoughts had gone behind the door along with Rukawa-kun.

"I well… I…" Sakuragi-kun scratched his head, "Goodnight…"

"Huh?" I raised my brows.

"I just want to say that. Ha-ha… sorry. Well… goodnight. Bye!" Sakuragi-kun quickly left with his face blushed in red.

I was confused, but then I thought I'll ask him tomorrow what he meant about I'm more than just a bestfriend to him.

I walked inside my house carefully. I peeked to the guest room. Rukawa-kun was sitting there with my brother. But then Nii-chan stood up and went upstairs, maybe to get something in his room.

Slowly I approached Rukawa-kun. "Um, hi…"

Rukawa-kun glanced at me and nodded a bit.

"You got an appointment with my brother this late. Is it about the basketball club?"

"Yes."

Actually I wanted to offer him some tea, but I saw the cups at the table. My mother must've made them.

"Well, I must go to my room now. Goodnight," I grinned awkwardly and quickly left. I think I'm embarrassing myself.

"Haruko…"

I felt my heart jumped when Rukawa-kun called my name.

"Yes?"

"You're still gonna tutor me tomorrow?" Rukawa-kun asked without looking at me.

"Y-yes… sure. I promised you, right?"

"Okay…"

"Okay…" I said rather mumbling, "Goodnight…"

"Uh… Haruko…" Rukawa-kun called me again, this time his voice was rather soft. "You went out with him?"

"Who?" My voice was above a whisper. Actually I was scared to ask that…

"Sakuragi."

I gulped. "Only to a concert…"

"Oh…"

"Rukawa-kun…" I said carefully, "I'm sorry that I lied yesterday. I said you don't know the person I was going with, but actually you do. I'm sorry…"

"It doesn't really matter to me... I don't mean to meddle…"

"I don't mind if you do…"

Rukawa-kun slightly turned his face to me.

After saying that, I quickly ran upstairs to my room. I nearly bumped my brother.

"Be careful, Haruko!"

"Sorry, Nii-chan…"

At my room, I threw my bag and dropped myself on my bed. I can't believe I actually said the last line to him. I felt very shy but also happy.

I did feel bad for lying to him, but I thought I could feel that he cares about me. He said that it doesn't really matter to him, but maybe it does…

And if he does care, I wish he would be more honest to show it.

Rukawa-kun, maybe next time I'll be more honest to you as well I'm hoping you will…

**TO BE CONTINUED**


	13. The Single Day

**Disclaimer: I don't own Slam Dunk. It belongs to Takehiko-sensei.**

**Crusty's**** note: **It's been sooo… long, rite? Sorry for the very long delay. I was doing the latest chapter for this fic, but then I thought… 'No… I don't want to appear this one yet' (winks-winks). So, I ended up with this one you're about to read. Thx a lot for always staying tuned (and staying 'remain'—winks winks some more). This one is another short one but I hope u enjoy it…

…

**The Single Day**

I packed my books neatly in my bag. Yes, today I'm going to tutor Rukawa-kun again. But it won't be at my house. This time we're going to study at the public library. Not because school's off, but because he wanted so.

I couldn't stop my self from smiling remembering what happened last night.

FLASHBACK

Nii-chan was still having his conversation with Rukawa-kun in the guest room. I don't know for sure what they were talking about, but I could hear Nii-chan was saying about the activities at the basketball club when I went downstairs to the kitchen.

When I noticed Rukawa-kun was ready to leave and Nii-chan was going to walk him to the front door, I quickly followed them.

Rukawa-kun was about to exit through the front door when I gathered all my courage and called him.

"Ah, Rukawa-kun…?"

Rukawa-kun and Nii-chan turned to me behind them.

"What is it, Haruko?" my brother was the one doing the questioning.

"Umm, I'd like to talk to Rukawa-kun about our tutoring session…" I said carefully and gave Nii-chan a 'can you please leave us' look.

"Okay…" I know Nii-chan was curious, but he tried to look casual. He turned to Rukawa-kun, "I'll tell Kogure about what we've just discussed earlier."

Rukawa-kun nodded. Then Nii-chan left us.

There was some freezing silent. I just smiled a bit to melt it. "Um, do you still need my help for tomorrow?" I asked carefully. Somehow I was kinda scared he would say no.

Rukawa said nothing for a while. "Sure," he replied then.

"Alright then." I almost didn't realize I was sighing in relieve. "So, what time you'll be here?"

Rukawa-kun stared somewhere for a second. "We won't be here," he said then staring at me.

"Huh?"

"I mean, maybe it would be good for me if I got my tutoring at a library. Maybe I could also borrow some books that I might need."

"Uh, but… school's off tomorrow…" I said a bit unsure.

"What about the public library? I think I'll have my tutoring there."

My eyes widened and I could feel my cheeks burn. Is this mean he's taking me out??

"If… that's okay with you," now he looks unsure.

"S-sure! Why not? I think library is a good idea! So… I'll see you there?"

"Yes. At ten."

"Okay!"

"Well, goodnight." Rukawa-kun turned to the door and went outside. I followed him to the front terrace.

"See you tomorrow, Rukawa-kun," I smiled to him before he leaves.

Rukawa-kun glanced at me and nodded, and then he straightly left without looking back.

And as for myself, I couldn't help myself but smiling, grinning, and squeaking. I must be look very stupid but I don't care. This is too… great!

END FLASHBACK

After making sure I got all the things I needed, I went out with a very happy feeling. "Ittekimasu!!"

-------------

The public library wasn't very crowded. In fact, there weren't so many people around. Well, that's normal. At this kind of sunny holiday, I think most of people would rather go to the mall or something.

The cool air from the air conditioner blew softly as I entered the library. I looked around and I found Rukawa-kun sitting at one of the spacey table. A couple of books were scattered in front of him, and he was reading a magazine about basketball.

I didn't quickly approach him. I took my time a while to observe him. I don't see Rukawa-kun dressed like this very often. Most of the time—very most of the time—I see him in his school uniform, his jersey, or his shirt he usually wears at practice time.

Right now, he was wearing jeans and a dark blue v-neck jumpsuit which made him looks so cool.

I just couldn't stop staring at him. It was weird—and somewhat scared me—how I suddenly think there might not be another time where I can just stare him like this, so I really took my time.

Suddenly Rukawa-kun lifted his face from the magazine he was reading and stared at me.

I was startled, and I think he was too. I guess actually he meant to look at the entrance to see if I was here already.

"Ah, um… good morning," I smiled awkwardly and approached him. I felt shy to realize he might've noticed I was staring at him before.

"Good morning," he replied in monotone.

Nervously, I took a seat beside him. Lightly, I could smell a nice scent from him. Maybe it was some men deodorant or something. Whatever that was, he smells good. Suddenly I felt like smiling.

And then we got onto our tutoring for that day. It went pretty good but a little longer than the first tutoring we had. Well, we did discuss more subjects than before. We stopped right at lunch time.

"I guess it would be enough for now," I closed my book. "Let's have lunch." I tried to speak casually even though the idea of having lunch with Rukawa-kun made me nervous.

Rukawa-kun stood up without saying a word. I think he agreed.

We left the library. I wasn't sure where we're going to have our meal, but I don't really think about it. What else to think when I'm having him with me…

----------------

Me and Rukawa-kun walked along the pavement among other people. It was kinda crowded because it was Sunday. We didn't walk side by side, Rukawa-kun was a bit ahead me.

Walking behind him, I realized how tall he is. Of course I know that, but I've never really 'know' it until now. I felt like a munchkin walking behind him.

Still walking, suddenly Rukawa-kun slightly turned to me, "Do you want to eat here?" I looked at my left. McDonald's.

"Okay." And then we entered the place.

----------------

Inside, we sat facing each other with our orders on the table. If someone saw us, he might think that we're some couples.

I bit my burger carefully while I stared at him. He munched his food casually as if he was alone at our table. Slowly, I sighed. I change my mind; I don't think anyone who saw us would say that we're couples.

"You're not that hungry, are you?"

I quickly lifted my face. Rukawa-kun was staring at me. He already finished his eating.

"Uh, well…" Actually I am hungry, but I just don't eat that fast.

"Do you always eat like that?" Rukawa-kun asked again. He emptied his glass. I really never thought he would ask so much questions (thinking that he's so quiet, two questions are 'so much questions').

Um, yes," I replied rather shy. It wasn't a shame that I eat slowly, but I just felt shy. Maybe it was because he who asked the question. I tried to finish my eating quickly. All those burger and fries and cola.

"Its okay," suddenly Rukawa-kun spoke again. I looked at him with my hands grabbing the food. He took out a magazine from his bag. "You don't have to be in a hurry like that. Don't worry, I won't leave you."

I couldn't see his face because it was covered by the magazine he was reading. I wonder if he laughed at my stupidity behind those pages. Oh dear, I must be looked very silly…

After some minutes, finally I'm done. While I was eating before, Rukawa-kun didn't shift his attention from his magazine a bit. Actually, I was going to ask him some questions, just to start a conversation. But it seemed that his reading really caught his attention, so I didn't do that.

"Um… I'm done. Do you wanna leave now?" I said carefully to the person who was hiding his face behind the magazine pages.

Rukawa-kun put down his magazine and nodded, "Okay."

------------

"Do you wanna go back to the library now?" I asked him while we walked rather side by side. I was kinda having difficulty in catching up his pace and it wasn't that easy to lift up my face high so I can look at his face.

Rukawa-kun glanced at me. Then he looked to his front again. "No, I think I had enough studying today."

"Oh…" I was still walking rather in a hurry with my small steps. "Um, so we're going home?" Please say no. Please say you wanna go somewhere else with me…

"I want to go to the music store."

He said HE wants to go to the music store. He didn't say we're going to the music store.

"Um… okay," I looked down, "I… I'll see you tomorrow at school… Bye…" I turned to find my way home.

"You're not going?" Rukawa-kun's careful tone startled me. Does he want me to go with him? He said he wants to go there, not that he was asking me to go with him.

"Well, I…" I looked at my right and left, confused and unsure. "Do you want me to go with you?" I asked uncertainly.

Rukawa-kun's expression changed a bit. I don't know if I was right, but he did seem rather surprised. He didn't reply. He just stared at me with the same uncertainty. Somehow I felt he wasn't really staring at me, but for a while I think he was.

Suddenly he just turned around and started to walk away. I can't tell was that supposed to mean he doesn't want me to go with him or that he wants me to follow him. So, I just stood there didn't know exactly what to do.

Rukawa-kun slightly turned to view me again and seemed to be confused finding me just standing there. Then he faced me entirely. "Don't just stand there looking like that. I won't leave you."

It took me some time to understand what the meaning of his words is. But then I smiled again. I approached him and we walked our way to the music store.

Rukawa-kun, I still can't understand you. You're acts and you're words sometimes still puzzling me. But now, I'm beginning to understand them little by little.

And I think I know something: they're cold on the surface just like a stone, but they're warm inside like a well knitted sweater. The sweater of your words I'm wearing right now.

TO BE CONTINUED


	14. The Tensai's Deduction

**Disclaimer: I don't own Slam Dunk. It belongs to Takehiko-sensei.**

**Crusty's Note: **During doing this fic, I received lots of reviews saying _'it's very rare to see a RuHaru fic'_. As for myself, from the first time I started to post this fic , I've _never_ found other RuHaru fic besides my own. **Untill **some days ago, I finally found some (yipee!). And now, I'm happy to know that actually I'm not alone in this business, he he… Hi to all of you who also writes RuHaru :)

I also received lots of suggestions to fix the grammatical errors I made. To be honest, even until now, I haven't found myself a beta-reader (sob… sob…). And that's sad because I desperately needing one.

Well, enough with the blahs. Enjoy this one, minna…

---

**The Tensai's Deduction**

A beautiful day, a perfect weather, somewhat a good place to go to, but definitely THE most perfect person to be with. That's how I see this whole day.

After tutoring Rukawa-kun at the public library, we went to the music store. Inside, Rukawa-kun checked out some CDs and some new releases. I did the same thing. I remembered I haven't bought any new CD lately.

While I was looking at the pop music section, Rukawa-kun listened to some samples. He seemed to enjoy it. I smiled. He must be likes music a lot. Well, maybe not as much as he likes basketball, but I can tell he likes what he hears.

I got near him when he was beginning to play other song.

"Who's that?" I asked him casually.

"Blue Hearts," he replied short.

I raised my brows. Carefully, I asked him, "Do you like Blue Hearts?"

"Mm… so-so…" He glanced at me, "Do you?"

"Yes! I like them very much! By the way, do you know that they just held a concert yesterday?" I said excitedly.

"Yes, I know. You went there?"

"Why, yes! Actually, Sakuragi-kun asked me to…" suddenly I stopped realizing where my conversation heading to. Rukawa-kun stared me with his usual flat expression. I stared him back, but I just can't decide should I speak again.

"… I went there with Sakuragi-kun yesterday…" I finished my line. But I didn't look at him when I said that.

"Oh…." Rukawa-kun stared back at the panel in front of him. "Did you have fun?"

I raised my face staring at him. I never expect he would ask that but I'm glad he keeps on talking to me.

"Well… yeah… I mean, the Blue Hearts was great. I really enjoyed that concert. I mean, I seldom went to a concert, but that one was… great!"

"What's their latest album?"

"Umm… _'Cracking shells'_. I heard it's a good one, but I haven't bought it. I got some emergency expenses this month," I grinned.

Rukawa-kun put down his headphones. He went to one of the rack in that store and chose some CDs. I guess he already made up his choice after hearing some samples. I followed him.

Suddenly, someone called my name, "Haruko-chan!"

I looked behind me. "Ah! Sakuragi-kun? Wow, I never thought I'd meet you here." Sakuragi-kun was with his friends, Mito and the other.

"Me too, "Sakuragi-kun said cheerfully, "Are you here alone?—" Sakuragi-kun didn't continue his line. I saw his eyes stopped somewhere behind me.

I turned around. Rukawa-kun was standing behind me. Not too close, but he was behind me with a CD in his hand.

"N-No, I was with Rukawa-kun," I replied, still a bit surprised.

Sakuragi-kun approached Rukawa-kun and his eyes stared straightly to Rukawa-kun. "Rukawa, I thought you're the human ice block. I never thought you'd ask Haruko-chan out, you sly kitsu—"

"I didn't ask her out," Rukawa-kun cut him quickly, and it was sort of a kick to my gut. "I ask her to tutor me. After that we went here. By the way, I don't think that's any of your business."

"Teme!"

"Sakuragi-kun!" Spontaneously I nearly shouted to see Sakuragi-kun seemed to be mad.

Sakuragi-kun turned to me and his face calming down. "Sorry, Haruko-chan," he said sincerely. Then he turned to Rukawa-kun again and grinned, "Rukawa, I knew it that you must be jealous because yesterday you saw me and Haruko-chan went out together."

My heart thumped to hear that. _Really?_

Sakuragi-kun continued, "You envy that, that's why you asked her to tutor you today. I'm sure it's just a reason you made up. You can't think of a good reason, so you used this tutoring thing as an invitation to ask her out. Tsk-tsk, that is very lame of you, Rukawa…"

"Wow, I never thought Hanamichi could make a good deduction like that," Takamiya, one of Sakuragi-kun's friends, snickered.

"Hn? What's that supposed to mean!?" Sakuragi-kun growled, but he somewhat blushed.

"Me too," suddenly Rukawa-kun spoke and made Mito and the other laughed while Sakuragi-kun growled more.

"Aargh!! You ask for it, Rukawa!!" Sakuragi-kun approached Rukawa-kun. For some seconds ago I thought these boys were joking, but now I think they're really going to start a fight.

"Sakuragi-kun! Stop! Mito, please stop him!" But Mito and the other were grinning as if they're waiting for a big show to start. Rukawa-kun also seemed have no desire to retreat. Oh-no, don't fight, especially at a public place like this.

But out of my prediction, both Rukawa-kun and Sakuragi-kun didn't throw any punches. I could see how Sakuragi-kun tried to hold his temper.

"Rukawa," he said, "I don't have to humiliate myself in front of everyone, especially Haruko-chan, by hitting you. How about a game tomorrow, huh? You and me."

Rukawa-kun paused for a moment. "Okay."

"That was disappointing…" Okusu said. The other boys also sighed in disappointment.

"Yeah, but Hanamichi is an athlete now, right? He won't do anything stupid." Mito winked to Sakuragi-kun.

"You got a point there, he-he…" Sakuragi-kun grinned.

"Yeah-right! Like we would buy that!" Mito and the other laughed hysterically.

"Temee!! How dare you guys mock me!!" Sakuragi-kun chased his friends out of the store.

"Do aho…" Rukawa-kun sighed.

I smiled in relieve because they didn't fight. Even though Mito was actually joking, but I think he was right that Sakuragi-kun already turned to a good basketball player and won't be easily to follow his temper.

Rukawa-kun already went to the cashier to pay. I waited him by the exit.

"What CD did you buy?" I asked while we were walking along the pavement.

"_Cracking Shells_."

"Really!? The Blue Hearts!?"

"Yes."

"That's a good choice! I'm sure you'll like them very much." I felt excited thinking that we could share the same interest and maybe we'll talk about Blue Hearts a lot.

"You tell me how good they are," Rukawa-kun pushed the small plastic bag from the CD store to me. Inside, there was the _'Cracking Shells'_.

"Huh?"

"Actually I'm not that sure about them. You listen to it, and then you tell me how good they are. If you said they're really good, maybe I'll listen to it."

I received the bag hesitantly. "Um… okay…" I stared at the plastic bag for a while, and then put it in my bag. Secretly, I smiled.

"Hi, Haruko-chan."

I looked at my right. Sakuragi-kun was standing there grinning.

"Sakuragi-kun? Where's the other?"

"I told them to get lost wherever they wish. Well, I don't mean to bother you… it's just that I feel responsible to guard you from any sly person, specifically from a certain sly kitsune…" Sakuragi-kun emphasized the word 'kitsune' but I don't understand what he means.

"Find a better thing to do, Do aho," suddenly Rukawa-kun spoke. I wonder why he should call Sakuragi-kun 'Do aho'.

"Nani? You mean guarding Haruko-chan isn't an important thing? Why, of course you'd think so. Because you don't want anyone get in your way, right?"

"Sakuragi-kun. Rukawa-kun won't do anything bad, if that's what you mean."

"Haruko-chan, you just don't know that some people could be very deceiving…" Sakuragi-kun sighed and shook his head slowly as if he was sorry for something.

I chuckled, "Okay, so you guard me next time, okay? I'll be fine with Rukawa-kun today."

"What? But, Haruko-chan…"

"They're waiting for you," Rukawa-kun pointed some place.

Mito and the other were standing not too far from us. I think they were observing us, but they didn't bother to hide. Naughty grins were on their faces, just like little playful kids.

"They always put their fingers on everything I do," Sakuragi-kun murmured.

"Haruko," Rukawa-kun called me, "Thanks for the help. I should be going now. Bye."

"Ah? Uh, okay… Bye…"

Rukawa-kun walked away and found his own way home. I stared at his back in disappointment.

"Ah, finally he gave up. Thanks to my firm guarding," Sakuragi-kun approached me, "Haruko-chan are you—"

"Huh? W-What's that, Sakuragi-kun?" I startled by his question. But it seemed that Sakuragi-kun was too. He paused and stared at me.

"Are you okay, Haruko-chan?"

"Uh... Yes, I'm fine."

Sakuragi-kun was still staring at me. "Sorry," he said then.

"What? Why are you sorry, Sakuragi-kun?"

"I made you mad, didn't I?"

"What? No, of course no. What makes you think so?"

"Well, it's not that I like to admit it, but you want to stay with him, don't you? But now I made him leave."

"Well, I never think that he left because of you, Sakuragi-kun."

"Yeah, whatever his reason was, like I said before: he's lame. I bet he's too chicken to act like a man in front of a girl. He knows nothing besides showing off at basketball," Sakuragi-kun snorted proudly.

"Wow, I never thought you'd be this wise, Hanamichi!" suddenly Takamiya already behind him with the rest of the boys.

"Didn't I tell you to get looost!!?" Sakuragi-kun chased them again, while Mito and the other laughed out loud.

I chuckled to see their act. Indeed, disappointment still stays in my heart, but somehow Sakuragi-kun and the other cheer me up.

Suddenly I remembered the CD that Rukawa-kun borrowed me, and I started to remember what Sakuragi-kun said: _'he's lame'_. On second thought, maybe Sakuragi-kun was right. Well, I wouldn't say that Rukawa-kun is lame. I prefer the term 'dishonest'.

You can say I'm exaggerating, but I'm pretty well sure that he actually wants to give me this CD. Maybe I don't know Rukawa-kun that well, but I don't see him as a shy person or someone who cares a lot about his image. So, the only thing I can see is that he's just dishonest about something. In other word, he's denying. I'm not sure what he denials, but he's doing it.

"Haruko, do you want to have some ice-cream with us?" suddenly Takamiya popped up before me.

"Huh? Umm… well, I'm not in a hurry… Okay! I'll go with you guys!" I said cheerfully. It's a great way to end this wonderful day, anyway.

"Thank you, Sakuragi-kun," I said while all of us heading to the ice-cream parlor.

"Huh? Why you thank me?"

"For making me realizing something," I smiled.

"Well, you're welcome. But… realizing something? Ah! I know! You must be realizing that Rukawa is a bad person and you're thankful to have me guarding you, right? Nya-ha-ha! Don't mention it!"

"Not that, Sakuragi-kun!" I smirked.

---------------

That night, I decided to call Rukawa-kun. I'm gonna use the CD thing as an opening topic, but actually I want to talk more about him. I wonder if my theory about denying was right.

'_click' _I heard someone picked up the phone.

"Moshimoshi." I recognized his voice. We talked on the line for a couple of times, so I can tell it was him.

"Rukawa-kun? It's me, Haruko."

"Yes?"

"Umm, I've listened to the CD. It was great, seriously. I'm not saying this because I'm a fan of the Blue Hearts, but it's a great music. You won't sorry to have it."

"Oh, okay."

"Well, I don't think I had enough listening to it, but I'll bring it back to you at school since it's yours and you haven't listened to it—"

"Do you like it?" suddenly he asked.

"Yes! Of course I like it. Like I said, it was gre—"

"You can have it."

"What?"

"I said you can have it. You like it, don't you?"

I bit my lip. _'Okay, this is it, Haruko.'_ "Why you want me to have it? It's yours, isn't it?"

"Yes. But you said you like it—"

"That doesn't mean I want it."

"…"

"Rukawa-kun, may I ask you something?"

No reply. But I continued, "When I was at the concert area with Sakuragi-kun yesterday, I thought I saw you there too. Am I right? I mean, were you really there yesterday?" I asked carefully because I don't want him to think that I was interrogating him.

"…Yes, I was there."

My heart jumped to hear that. "You were? What were you doing there? I mean, you got an appointment with my brother, you wouldn't watch any concert, am I right?"

"That's all I'm gonna say to you. The rest of it is really none of your business and I got no necessary to explain it to you."

I got silenced by the cold reply, and by that time I also realized my stupidity. Privacy is an important matter to everyone and I think I've just crossed that line. I think I AM interrogating him.

"I-I'm sorry, Rukawa-kun… I really don't mean to mind your business… I was just wondering… I'm really sorry!" I closed my eyes tightly and hoping he wasn't mad at me. Well, it's okay if he's mad, but I hope he won't hate me.

No reply. But I also didn't hear he hung up. Was he leaving the phone?

"…Haruko…" I heard he said. My heart was beating with uncertainty. I'm ready if he was going to scold me.

"At your house, you said before that you're okay if I was meddling with your business… Why is that?"

"W-What do you mean?" I still felt nervous.

"I want to know why you're okay if I'm meddling with your business. Aren't you supposed to feel bothered?"

I could still hear him with his usual monotone voice, but somehow, he also sounded asking innocently just like a clueless child.

"I don't know…" I replied sincerely, and that's the truth. You just can't find a reasonable answer.

"Look, Rukawa-kun… I'm terribly sorry if you feel that I'm minding your business. I just want you to know that I never meant so. I wasn't careful… I'm so sorry…"

"…Well, I do feel annoyed, but… it's okay. Don't worry. I'm not mad at you."

I felt like a huge stone lifted up from my shoulders. I felt so relieve.

"Anyway," I heard him again, "You can have the CD. And if in any case you're wondering why, actually I bought it for you. So there." He spoke kinda fast.

I'm speechless. My mouth was opened but no words came out of it.

"Is there anything more you want to talk about?"

"Huh? Uh, n-no… I mean, well, that's about it… Umm… I'll see you at school, Rukawa-kun…"

"Okay. Bye."

"Bye."

I put down the phone and automatically slide down to the floor. My heart was still beating fast. I was in between surprised and excited.

'_I bought it for you.'_

'_For. You.' _

Those words keep on spinning inside of my head. I pinched my cheek to make sure that I'm not dreaming. _'Okay, Haruko. Calm down… Easy… You have to be easy on him. Don't rush in…'_

Slowly, I took a deep breath. I was like doing some yoga breathing or something for a minute. After that, a smile appeared on my face. A very-very happy smile. I didn't exactly get what I want, thinking that I called him to know about some 'denying thingy'. But I got something that is no less great.

Suddenly I was like snapped out from my sweet dream and automatically tapped my head. "Why didn't I ask him the reason he gave me the CD!? Oh… stupid Haruko…" I pouted to realize my clumsiness (yes, I consider that clumsy).

I went to my room upstairs. In my room, I placed my self on my bed and doing some thinking. Suddenly I realized I got some important hints about Rukawa-kun. But right now I'm too happy and too blind to do some sequential thinking, so I just went back to the phone to call Yumi and Aki to tell them about the happy news. Sometimes they do the thinking stuff when I was too blind to do it. Maybe they could share their opinion, as usual, to me.

I hummed a merry song while walking to the phone.

Rukawa-kun, I know I'll get the answer I need along this labyrinth to your heart. Until then, please stay still where you are and don't turn your back on me.

Lot's of love, Haruko.

**TO BE CONTINUED**

**---**

**Crusty's endnote: **From the first time I wrote this fic, I planned this going to be a Haruko POV—and only gonna be a Haruko POV. But when this fic reached somewhere around its 8th chapter, I started to think I do need Rukawa POV. Some of you have told me to make Rukawa POV, and don't yah worry, it WILL be coming your way. Actually it was gonna be the 13th chappie, but like I said before, I don't want to appear that one yet, he he…

Making a Rukawa POV for this fic won't be that easy to me, thinking that this fic already reached its 14th chapter, so it might take some time. Prepare your patience, okay? (as if you never have ;p) Doumo Arigatou for all your supports, matamite minna!


	15. Rukawa Kaede, Man of Denial

**Disclaimer: I don't own Slam Dunk. It belongs to Takehiko-sensei.**

**Crusty's**** Note:** Sumimasen! I must confess that even though I wanted to post this chap a.s.a.p but there were lots of time (take note LOTS) where I just maintained my habit of being lazy.

Anyway, this chapter is sort of flashback chapter, you might notice that it's some kind of summary through the whole previous chapters. Actually I think I still have to go on with this chap but I've been taking too much delay and personally I don't like that, soo… enough with my babbling, thanks for staying tuned :) Have a pleasant trip…

**---**

**Rukawa**** Kaede; Man of Denial**

Rukawa's POV

The cheering voices, the amazed whispers, the wishful stares. Not that I'm not aware of those things. I may be ignorant, but I'm not naïve. Yet, those stuffs still mean nothing to me.

I can understand the feeling of admiring someone. Hey, I play basketball, of course I got one or two players that I admire.

It's just that I don't take it too seriously. I got my own life and my own goals. Why should I bother about anything that got nothing to do with those?

I can never understand why people pay so much attention to things that are really none of their concern and got nothing to do with their needs.

For example: that crazy sect who called themselves the Rukawa-shineitai. Those noisy pom-pom girls with my name on their banners (for god sake, that's what I call AHO) always look very enthusiastic whenever they're watching my game. Why should they? What am I to them that it's a big deal if I'm winning or losing? To be honest, I'm rather annoyed with their noise.

Okay, maybe they're happy for me as fans (like I need one), but I really don't understand the hysteria.

I like basketball a lot. I want to be the best at basketball. In fact, I want to be a professional basketball player. Of course it makes sense if I'm giving everything to it. It's all about what I like and about my life.

But giving everything to something that's out of your needs? I think I have to pass on that…

---------------------

I felt my head spinning. As I gathered my consciousness, I saw the school gate in front of me. I realized I just fell from my bike. I must've hit something (or maybe someone). Usual thing, it happens almost everyday.

A girl tried to help me to stand. Not just a girl, actually. Yeah, I know her. She's Captain Akagi's sister. One of those 'people'. Not the noisy kind, but I think she could be one of the annoying type in one or another way.

"A-Are you okay?" she asked.

"Yes," I replied after glancing her a while. Then I paddled away before she asked me the same question again.

Why do I get a bad feeling this thing is going to happen pretty frequent today?

-------------------

I won't consider myself as the one with the sixth sense, but what I was afraid of would happen really happened.

I met that girl again (what was her name? Ah, Akagi Haruko) at the corridor as I was going for the roof top (today is special, I'm going to have my beauty sleep there).

"Where are you going, Rukawa-kun?" she asked with a smile.

"The rooftop," I answered while I was passing her. No need to stop, anyway.

"Why? It's not break time yet."

Do you really have to keep on asking? It's none of your business! And that's what exactly came out of my mouth then, "None of your business."

Then I quickly left her. Maybe I looked scary because she seemed kinda scared. Whatever… She won't cry, right? She's a big girl.

As I walked away, I could still hear her said, "I was just worrying about you, Rukawa-kun!"

Worrying? About me? Now that's the thing you should ask to yourself.

Why should you worrying about me? What's the reason?

--------------------

That night I went to the book store. I need to buy some stuff for my educational activities (blah).

There were two girls in front of me when I was waiting in line in front of the cashier. They didn't talk out loud, but I could hear their conversation (even though I wasn't eavesdropping).

"He really did that?" The first girl asked to her friend.

"Yes." The second girl replied. "But I don't mind about that," she said again.

"What? Rejecting your gift is rude enough, and he said it's ugly! That was very rude. I don't understand why you're not mad at him."

_Hey, maybe the guy was just being honest._

"Well, it was a lousy sweater anyway. And it's nearly summer."

"How could you say that? Are you really not mad at him?" the second girl still persisted.

"I felt disappointed and sad, that's true. I may be mad too, but… I don't know. I just can't suddenly hate him. Maybe if we like someone so much, no matter how difficult it is… you just can't say you had enough."

"Wow, he's not even your boyfriend…" the second girl sighed to the statement.

I could see the other girl just smiled hearing that.

She likes the guy, so she doesn't mind the rudeness. Isn't that… stupid?

Suddenly my mind took me to the scene happened this morning at school. I was also being rude to Akagi Haruko. Wonder what she thought after accepting my kind of attitude. Did she also take it fine just like this girl standing in front of me? Or did she suddenly hate me forever?

Ah, why should I bother that kind of thing… It got no importance to me.

After paying my goods, I straightly went home.

--------------------

I don't know what's got onto me, but that night, suddenly I recalled the conversation I accidentally heard at the book store.

_'Maybe if we like someone so much, no matter how difficult it is… you just can't say you had enough.'_

Feelings… how they can really distract people and make them unreasonable.

It's not that I cannot feel anything or actually don't have any feelings left inside of me (that would be horrible, right?). I just happen to be ignorant. (I grew with good parents, and I don't exactly know where the hell I got this ignorant attitude—I guess I'm just lucky).

Anyway, tomorrow's gonna be a good day at school. Another basketball and more basketball. Yay. Oyasumi, world…

--------------------

Ayako blew her whistle, and automatically all of us stopped our feet and went to the bench to rest. It's another way to say it's time for break.

"Saa… it's the right time to be a brand new person." I heard the ex-MVP—and also the ex-gangster—Mitsui spoke to Kogure while he sat his butt on the bench

"Sure it is, Mitsui," Kogure replied and wiped the sweat off his neck.

"Well this nasty gangster attitude won't be that easy rubbing off from me, but I'm a good person from the day I was born, so it won't take so much time for me to reborn myself to my genuine personality," Mitsui grinned proudly. I knew it that he has it in him. You know, the narcissist attitude.

"What's Micchi talking about, Kogure?" suddenly the moronic Sakuragi got interested in their conversation. Nosy…

"Mitsui is trying to fix his image," Kogure replied.

"Well, that's good, but what's left to fix from you, Micchi?"

"What's that suppose to mean?" Mitsui frowned while Miyagi snickered and Kogure smirked.

"Well it's better late than never, right?" Kogure patted Mitsui's shoulder, maybe to calm him down. I think Kogure is always the one nicest to him.

"Yeah," Mitsui stretched his shoulders a bit, "It's not my habit, but I started to get annoyed every time other people only see me as 'Mitsui Hisashi the gangster'. I've promised to Anzai-sensei that I'll never fight again, and now I think I should be known as Mitsui Hisashi the basketball player. Yes… it's the perfect time for me to reborn…" Mitsui grinned in satisfaction.

I wonder why he gives a damn to what people think about him… He is what he is, right? The hell to what people think. Oh, I forgot… he's narcissist…

"Say… speaking about this reborn thingy… I think you should try it too, kitsune," Sakuragi grinned annoyingly to me. He looks dumber with that grin on his face.

"Yeah!" This time Miyagi spoke too. "If you keep on acting like the way you use to, you will _literally_ turn to a gigantic ice mountain like those at the North Pole. And by the time you realize, it's already too late to change. Those ice blocks are very hard to melt you know…"

Not funny…

"Hey, I think that's right, Rukawa," Kogure started to meddle too, "Why don't you try Ryota's advice."

"I think someone is more suitable to try that," I glanced at Sakuragi.

"Huh? You mean me?" He pointed his face. Wow, I didn't expect he would get it that fast. He deserves a biscuit and a pat on the head.

"Yes. I mean you. You got lots of damaged aspects in you that need to be fixed." I took my bottle and left those guys.

"Grrh! Speak for yourself! I'm way-way better than you, baka kitsune!" I could hear Sakuragi growled behind me while Kogure tried to calm him down. As I sat on another bench, I still could see that moron grumbled with Mitsui and Miyagi teasing him. They agreed with my opinion (See?).

"Oi, Rukawa."

I looked up. Ayako was standing in front of me.

"Nani?" I looked down to my bottle again before really drained it.

"Nothing important," she sat down beside me, "Actually I was listening to what you guys were talking about, and I think they got point there. Why don't you try to be more buddy-buddy with other people? Won't hurt you at all."

Suddenly captain Gori, I mean… captain Akagi clapped his hands and told us to gather up and continue our practice. I stood up and walk to the center of the court.

Sure… being friendly won't hurt me. I know that. But I just don't really have the time to do it. Not right now.

-----------------

After school, I drop by at the grocery store before heading home. My mother asked me to buy some supplies for breakfast (See? I'm a very good boy).

After I took the shopping basket, I straightly went to where they placed peanut butter and all those kind of stuff. But suddenly I felt like shopping other meal. I'm thinking about natto.

When I was approaching the racks, I saw someone there reaching somewhere up the rack with all her might with her tiny figure. Gee, she looks pathetic. I walked towards the girl to help her reach the natto box she was trying to grab (See? I'm a very-very good boy).

"Here…" I handed her the box.

"Rukawa-kun!"

Huh? Oh… you… Her. Akagi Haruko.

I quickly took another box and put it in my shopping basket before she started to talk again.

"Shopping?"

Too late…

"Yes." I went on with my shopping and tried to pretend she's not there. La-la-la…

"Do you usually shop here?" Out of my prediction, she followed me—or maybe I should've known that.

She keeps on asking me questions that I only need to answer with 'yes' or 'no'. Suddenly I remember how I've been rude to her yesterday. She talks to me as if I've never been rude or nasty to her. This is so similar to the conversation between the two girls at the book store that I accidentally heard.

Haruko keeps on throwing questions about peanut butter and jelly at me and I started to get annoyed.

"Why don't you try this brand?" she offered me a different chocolate spread than the one I use to have. "It's better than that one," she pointed the chocolate spread jar in my hand, "Trust me, I know."

Would you stop following me if I take that? I really wish I could say that to her, but she put a very cheeky smile, and I don't know why I took that jar without a word. I guess I just don't want her to sulk if I refuse. She looks like the weeping kind.

"Thank you," I said and left her. Actually she's a nice girl. Maybe that's why she easily excused my rudeness before. And her smile is sincere. And her friendliness isn't that really annoying as I thought before (thinking that she had the time to advice me about some chocolate spread).

"Rukawa-kun!" She called me suddenly. "Thank you to you too!"

"What?"

"The natto…"

"No problem." I quickly replied. It wasn't a big deal but she looks so grateful.

I went to the cashier to pay my goods. She also did the same thing. Her presence doesn't feel too annoying anymore. Yeah, I guess Ayako was right, a little friendliness won't hurt me.

I was ready to leave the store with my bike when Haruko approached me.

"Rukawa-kun, see you tomorrow at school," she smiled.

"Yes," I answered casually after shifting my attention from her smile. Then I paddled my bike home.

I feel the cold wind on my face as I dashed away fast. Maybe it was what Ayako said about being buddy-buddy or maybe it was Haruko Akagi's friendly smile, but I don't feel like myself anymore.

I feel distracted from the usual goal-oriented Rukawa Kaede that I use to be.

I sighed. Feelings… how they can really distract people and make them unreasonable…

But I'm glad I still have them.

------------------

Dilemma.

I'm on a dilemma.

Like I said before, I grew with good parents. Despite the fact that sometimes I'm a bit impolite (perhaps so), good manners also part of my life.

I don't know should I feel happy or not, but the chocolate spread Akagi Haruko promoted was damn good. And speaking of good manners, I guess I have to thank her for introducing me to that delicious thing that comes in a jar.

This is a dilemma though. Probably I'd just say thanks to her, but I'm pretty aware that she kinda admired me or whatever. So I'm worried that she'll take it too seriously. She might end up following me anytime anywhere. Aargh! That would be very annoying! I can imagine it already…

Well, maybe I'm overreacting. (What am I? A rock star?) I guess just a small thanks won't troubles me. Okay, I'll thank her tomorrow at school.

---------------

Our practice at the gym ended kinda late that night. But I don't mind, adding more couple of hours would be good too.

While the freshmen started to clean up, some visitors arrived at the gym. Four friends of aho-Sakuragi and Akagi Haruko. I didn't see her at the practice periods this morning and during the school break. Not that I'm expecting her to be here, but I've planned to thank her about the chocolate spread thing.

Aho-Sakuragi quickly approached her like a monkey to his trainer. Well, I guess I'll talk to her after I'm done with my cleaning.

"Sakuragi! What are you doing? Mop the court right now!" I heard captain Akagi scolded Sakuragi and after some debating, he straightly grab a mop. Slowly I sighed. Once an idiot will always be an idiot…

In the middle of the moping I was doing, I glanced a while to see if Haruko wasn't talking to anyone because I need to talk to her after this. Oh, she wasn't. At the moment where I glanced at her, I thought she was staring at me. Well, maybe I was just seeing things.

"Let's go, Haruko." I heard captain Akagi called her sister. They were ready to go home. I approached her before she walked to follow her brother. I was planning to show some gratitude, right?

"Haruko…" I called her. She turned and somewhat seemed surprised.

"R-Rukawa-kun? What is it?"

I was thinking what I should say while she stared at me unsure. "Thank you," I said then. That was all coming out of my mouth. I couldn't think of something else (I only planned to say thanks anyway).

"Thank you? For what?" _And I was planning to show some good attitude…_

"The chocolate spread. It was good, I like it."

Suddenly she looked cheerful. "You're welcome! I told you it was good!" She put another cheeky smile. The one similar to the smile I saw at the grocery store.

"Jya…" I quickly turned to go back with my cleaning.

Suddenly aho-Sakuragi approached me. "Oi, kitsune! What were you and Haruko-chan talking about?"

I sighed. Nosy… "Nothing got to do with you."

"What did you say? You weren't flirting around, were you?" he narrowed his eyes.

"I'm not interested in doing that. What's your business anyway?"

"Grrgh…!"

Suddenly Haruko who eventually ready to leave the gym shouted to us, "See you tomorrow Rukawa-kun, Sakuragi-kun!" Then she went off with captain Akagi.

"Wait, Haruko!" the dimwit Sakuragi tried to catch up but she had gone after waving to him.

"But… wait, Haruko-chan…!" He sighed after she was really out of sight. And I did the same thing, "Do aho…"

----------------------

The next day, I totally forgot that I've thanked Akagi Haruko at the gym before. But then I was forced to recall the happening. I think I was just waking up from my peaceful sleep in class when I heard someone called my name.

"Rukawa-kun."

Still felt very sleepy and wishing to continue my sleep, I lifted up my head slowly to acknowledge the being who called me. "What?" Hey, isn't that Akagi Haruko? (And that's when I remembered I've thanked her). That might've been the reason she's here right now.

"Here… it's for you," she handed me a lunchbox.

_D'uh__— can anyone explain why she gave this to me—? _

"I made it this morning. Here, take it," she said again.

Is this because I came up to her yesterday? Is this because I was trying to show some gratitude? _Is this because I tried being buddy-buddy to other people?_

I don't want to say this but I have to before I'm totally annoyed by her, "Why should I?" Yes, why should I take your lunchbox?

Suddenly she got silenced. She seemed a bit startled. Maybe now she realized she doesn't have the need to give that to me.

"Umm…" she tried to answer me, "Because I thought you would like it. It's chocolate spread sandwiches," Then she smiled firmly. But I don't think she's that sure.

I tried to figure what I should say. What I should say to make her understand that I don't need it. That should be easy, "No, thanks. I had that this morning."

After saying that, I got up from my chair and went outside heading to the gym. It's time for basketball.

Exiting the classroom door, I was busy with my own thoughts. I don't recall I've been too nice to Akagi Haruko that she took it very seriously and made her brought me lunch.

I don't know if this means she's way-way too friendly or she's annoying, or maybe nosy. One thing I know, I don't need this. I don't crave for this overdose appreciation or affection or whatever they call it.

And maybe the thing that confusing me the most is that she bother to give something that I don't understand the reason for.

_'…Maybe if we like someone so much, no matter how difficult it is… you just can't say you had enough.'_

Why do you want to give that to me, Haruko? Is it because you like me? If we like someone, do we always do that?

_Do you like me that much?_

----------------------

During the basketball practice, I almost forgot about that lunchbox thing when suddenly I heard Sakuragi shouted. "Haruko! Is that for me?" He approached Akagi Haruko who apparently was already at the gym door with her friends. I saw a lunchbox in her hands. The one she wanted to give me before.

"Ah… Sakuragi-kun. Well… actually I was kinda felt making sandwiches this morning. That's all. But if you want it, you can have it." She handed him the box. (It's not that I actually want to know what they were talking about, but I was just slightly wondering how she was doing after I refused her sandwiches).

"Yaay! Haruko brought me lunch!" Aho-Sakuragi shouted and raised his hands up. In no time, captain was right behind him and gave him a special complete package of his delicious Gori-punch.

I shifted my attention to Haruko. She was smiling. She looks fine. Not like she's been crying or shocked or something. I don't know why, but I felt somewhat relieve to see her doing fine (or at least looking fine, I don't know for sure).

I was rather startled when suddenly Haruko turned her eyes on me. I immediately went back with my practicing.

Gee, she even still had the time to look at me. I thought she wouldn't wanna see me anymore. She's puzzling. Or maybe every girl is puzzling. Hey-hey, what's with you, Kaede? Focus! Focus! First thing first. Basketball first.

---------------------

The sky already went dark when our team finished our practice period. This period was kinda noisy because Sakuragi's gundan were mocking the clumsiness of that aho through the entire afternoon. They are so similar to that red-headed being: A.H.O.

Even it doesn't have any effect on me, this time I don't see Akagi Haruko and her very own gundan around. Maybe she got the message that I don't want her tagging me around.

"Nice game, boys! Keep the spirit for tomorrow, okay?" Ayako said enthusiastically.

The team went their way to the locker room and some to the shower room. I walked myself to wash my sweaty head.

"Aah… that was brilliant! Excellent!" I heard Sakuragi rather shouted enthusiastically as he entered the same room.

"What do you mean by brilliant, you did lousy shots back there," Miyagi snorted behind him.

"It was a natural mistake, okay? Everybody did that," Sakuragi hissed. He seemed rather embarrassed.

"Not me," said Miyagi lightly. "Seriously, what do you mean by brilliant?"

"This whole day is a beautiful day! I did well at practice sessions, I didn't forget my homework—well, I didn't forget about it, but still I didn't do it, anyway, most of all; Haruko-chan brought me nutritious lunch! Was that something or what?"

"Yippee…" Miyagi said in monotone, mocking the red-haired. "So what next? You're going to ask her out, aren't you?" he grinned poking Sakuragi's waist.

"Well… now that you mention it…" Sakuragi replied proudly.

If only that aho knew the sandwiches was a rebound… sigh…

"Love will find its true way I suppose," that redhead spoke again, surprisingly in a sheer awkward aristocratic way, "No matter how much you think you're in love with a certain person, if your heart is actually has been stolen by someone else, you'll coming back to admit that someone is your real love…"

"Or the opposite, you think you hate someone but then you might ending up head over heels to the person," Miyagi added grinning.

"Ha-ha, you're right," a silly smirked on Sakuragi's face made me believe some wise-ass ghost was taking over his body for a moment there to speak about some words of wisdom or whatever about love and all that la-la things.

"You see kitsune," suddenly he approached me, "I guess now Haruko find out her heart's true calling," another silly grin appeared on his face.

"Whatever…" I swung my towel on my neck and left those two.

If only he knew… If only he knew the sandwiches was… ah, whatever!

"Wonder what Haruko will bring me tomorrow…" I could still hear his voice behind me talking to Miyagi. The other gave an unsupportive reply and took the pleasure in mocking him instead.

What a wishful thinking… she won't bring you anything tomorrow, you silly. The sandwiches was just… aargh! Stop thinking! What do you care, Kaede?

Though… wonder why she gave that to Sakuragi anyway? Why didn't she just eat it with her friends or gave it to the pigeons or whatever? Why she had to bring that along to the gym today?

"Hey, what's with you, Rukawa?" Suddenly I realized Ayako was standing and staring at my face. Her brows were rather knitted.

"Nothing," I gave a simple reply and some kind of a message that she shouldn't ask me another question.

"Really?"

Obviously she didn't receive the message. But it was her tone that made me turn around facing her. "What do you mean?"

She put a certain smile and walked across me, "You seem to have something occupying your mind when you were walking out there.

I glanced to a direction she pointed with her eyes. Sakuragi and Miyagi were still chattering around.

"Well, I got a life and I think about it. Maybe that's what you saw." I quickly left her before she started again.

Something occupying my mind… yea-sure… no-hell-way. The only thing that would be stealing entire of my thoughts is just the b-ball and my aim to be the best at it. Nothing else.

------------------------

After I arrived home that night, it took me about two and a half hour of looking for reasonable defensive reason before I admit that Ayako was _damn right_. Something _IS_ occupying my mind and I believe it's the feeling of guilt.

I don't fancy in mingling with people, yet, as I've mentioned way-way before, good manners are also part of my life. I think I've done a pretty harsh thing to Akagi Haruko today. It's realistic to reject her offering, but I shouldn't be too rude.

But then, I still feel uneasy and it is such a hard bitchy moment to admit that guilt isn't the only issue that is burdening me right now.

That aho Sakuragi Hanamichi and his daydream of getting closer with Haruko.

His babbling about some real love and lunch that Haruko gave him.

If only he knew it was only a silly rebound and Haruko actually meant to give that to me but I rejected it and perhaps she brought that to the gym today because she was hoping the slightest chance that I would eventually take it and she just couldn't say no when Sakuragi wanted it because she took pity for the idiot and…

"Damn…"

I murmured cursing myself for letting my emotion took control of me.

What if Haruko really wanted to give that damn sandwiches to Sakuragi, huh? Don't be such a big-headed.

Uncertainty… I hate this… And I hate it more because it's something I've never thought about before.

What's this feeling I'm getting? Rivalry? Hah! I never look up on that idiot. I know he's not suitable to be considered as a rival. He sucks in basketball.

Only… this isn't about basketball… it's something that myself couldn't understand. And I hate it to be so.

Uncertainty. The way you end such thing is by getting a confirmation to assure you. And I don't know why I couldn't think of other way to get it besides asking it to Akagi Haruko herself.

Why you brought those sandwiches? Why you didn't throw it away? And why above all you should give that to Sakuragi?

After struggling with my own hesitation, finally I picked up the phone to call her. I got Captain Akagi's phone number so it's not difficult to find a way to call her.

Her mother was the one to pick up the phone. Somehow, I started to think to hang up while she was calling Haruko to answer the call, but I'm Rukawa Kaede and I don't go back on my words.

"Moshi-moshi." I heard a tiny voice. She sounded somewhat like a chipmunk on the line.

"Moshi-moshi," I replied casually.

"Who am I speaking to?"

I thought she'd recognize my voice. I kinda hesitant to mention my name because I was wondering what kind of reaction I would get. ".…..Rukawa." There, I said it.

"W-who?" Came the reply after a moment of pause.

"Rukawa. Rukawa Kaede."

More pause. This felt weird.

"Ah, R-Rukawa-kun. What is it?" Finally I heard her again.

By the way, did she say 'what is it?' That's right, what is it? Why the hell did I call anyway? My mind was blank of a sudden. Uh… umm… hold on… "….Thank you..."

"Huh?"

I could hear that. I must be sounded not making any sense.

"Thank you for brought me sandwiches." I was being rude, I guess have to show some apology or whatsoever. Yes, guilty feeling is the thing that's occupying my mind, Ayako.

"Huh?"

Am I still sounded not making any sense? Okay, now I have to really show my apology. And so I went again…

"Though I said I didn't want it, that doesn't mean I hate chocolate spread sandwich. So… thank you."

Pause again. Is she really taking a pause or is it the connection that's bad?

I couldn't stand this weird situation. Finally I asked her what I want to know about, "Ano… It was for me wasn't it?"

"Huh?"

Okay, this is a clear message from the universe. I should've NOT called her.

"Nevermind. Jya…" I was ready to put down the phone.

"Wait, Rukawa-kun!" Suddenly she said loudly.

I held the phone close to my ear again waiting for the next line. I wonder if she's always slow like this on the phone.

"Rukawa-kun?" She called carefully.

"What?" What? Spill! I'm turning a bit impatience. My mood isn't at its best peak.

"Umm… umm… you're-you're welcome…"

I wanted to say more. But that didn't come out of my mouth. "Hai. Jya."

I quickly hung up. There was I standing still in front of the phone. Obviously things didn't go like I was planning before. What was that? 'Thank you for the sandwiches?' That's not what I wanted to say. And I also didn't get the answer I needed.

Ah… nevermind…

Back at my room, I'm lying on my comfortable bed and stared at the ceiling. Well, that wasn't all bad. She didn't hang up the phone when she knew it was me, she didn't scold me about my rudeness; overall I think she didn't hate me.

Wasn't bad at all… and I showed her that I'm actually a good person too.

Wonder how she'll look at me now… Ah, give it a rest, Kaede! You are what you are! Who cares to what people think? Who cares to what _she_ thinks?

Give it a rest… You don't care…

Oyasumi, world…

**TO BE CONTINUED**

**Crusty's**** endnote: **The first and the last this is not… see more Kaede you will …


	16. Rukawa Kaede, Still Man of Denial

**Disclaimer: I don't own Slam Dunk. It belongs to Takehiko-sensei.**

**Crusty's** **Note:** I'm alive!! They brought me back to live!!

**---**

**Rukawa** **Kaede; Still… Man of Denial**

Rukawa's POV

Another rising sun. Another morning. Another day. Another hoop to conquer.

As I entered the gym for morning practice, I saw some of first-graders were already grabbing mops in their hands. But they weren't doing the ritual. Instead, they were circling some tall red-topped idiot.

"I heard we should give something in return on White Day if you received goods on Valentine's Day. Well, I didn't receive the treats on Val's Day and this is not White Day, but who cares? And after that, we might will bring each other lunch everyday! Nya-ha-ha…!!"

Ah, so Sakuragi was telling them bedtime story.

I took another mop and start to clean the court. "Hey guys," I said to the others, "This place doesn't clean it self."

"Huh? Oh, right! Sorry… By the way, Rukawa, I didn't hear you coming," Kuwata grinned and stepped out from the circle and start the cleaning. The other guys followed him.

"What's with that? Can't you be less jealous if someone else is being the center of attention instead of you?" Aho-Sakuragi grumbled. He approached me, "By the way, you're late. You should be listening to my sweet act back there."

I kept on moping and ignored him as usual.

"Oi, kitsune!"

Strangely he's the one who started to get annoyed. Weird Aho…

"Listen, Rukawa…"

He kept on following me and ignoring the others complaining about him walking around on the court they've swept clean.

"…Guess what come after sandwiches? Can't think of an answer? The answer is shrimp rolls!! Oh yes, I'm a very thoughtful person…" He said the last sentence as if he was praising himself. After saying that, he went to do the cleaning. Once a while he would repeat his crazy babbling to the rest of the folks.

I sighed to his meaningless words. What was that all about? Sandwiches, shrimp rolls…

…Sandwiches??

As we finished the cleaning, Kuwata came up to me with a candy bar in his hand. "Rukawa, here you take it. I don't know if you eat sweet stuff or not, but right now I can't have this. My tooth is aching, it's quite troubling me."

"Why don't you give it to the other instead?"

"Oh, Sakuragi already gave them. He said he got tons of this because he helped a woman from the candy shop in finding her lost dog. He also said from now on it's gonna be a celebration day for him—though I don't really get it, so he gave us the candy bars." Kuwata stuffed the candy bar in to my palm and went to our teammates to start the practice session.

I stared at the candy bar in my hand and sighed. Gees, imagine this, I'm holding a sweet from that redhead… Perhaps I'll give this to a dog or something.

To think it over, I guess he really took the whole sandwiches thing very seriously. Well, considering last night phone call with Akagi Haruko, can't entirely blame that redhead for being such a jolly jumper today. Rebound or no rebound, it seemed like Haruko was sincere in handing Sakuragi the lunch. Though still, it was supposed to be for me.

But about that shrimp rolls he was saying… Could it be that Haruko brought him lunch today? A box of bento filled with shrimp rolls?

I shook my head quickly realizing I was losing myself again. Being occupied by some small matters like this… so-not-Kaede-like.

------------------

I yawned and stretched myself on my chair as the bell rang. I didn't had enough sleep during the first subject. I think I can hear the teacher's voice slightly in my sleep. So I quickly stood up and exited my classroom to have the most peaceful nap on the rooftop.

I walk slowly along the corridor. Can't walk faster. I think it's because I'm so damn sleepy.

Suddenly I saw someone appeared from the other end of the corridor. Not too far and not that close, but I recognize the figure.

Akagi Haruko.

Gee… Déjà vu… I remembered walking on the corridor to have a sleep on the rooftop and then accidentally met her on my way there. Only… this time it somehow felt different.

"Ohayou, Rukawa-kun," she greeted me with her voice that was rather soft. Perhaps she also remembered the last scene similar to this. You know, the one where I said mean-but factual words to her.

I stopped by my own will. Funny…

"……Ohayou."

There, I said it. It wasn't that I feel I have to greet her back or what. It just felt… it's natural to do that.

She smiled and bowed while walking passed me. She did it casually.

Then I continued my way to the rooftop.

It was kinda felt different seeing her back there. She wasn't becoming the Akagi Haruko I once met at the grocery store who was babbling about peanut butter and jelly or Akagi Haruko who suddenly appeared with her lunchbox in front of me.

Lunchbox… Wonder what she put inside the lunchbox for Sakuragi—that if she _is_ bringing him lunch…

".…..Haruko…"

Before I realize what had happened, Akagi Haruko already stopped and turned to me. She stared at me unsure.

I was still rather unsure myself why I suddenly called her, but then I approached her and took out something I remembered put it in my pocket.

"Here…" I handed her a candy bar. The one I got from Kuwata and he got it from Sakuragi.

She stared at the candy bar, then at me, then at the candy bar, and so on.

"F-for me?" She said finally after some view switching.

"Yes, in return for the sandwiches." I replied. Yes, still with the candy bar in my hand… hanging there in the air… For God sake, take it…

"Uh… thank-thank you…" She slowly took the candy bar after some more view switching. Gosh, it wasn't about the bad connection on the phone or something, she _is_ slow!

"Jya…" I quickly left her realizing I wasted time for my sleep.

A couple of days before this, doing that might felt so weird. Giving girls candy bar? Me??

But I remembered Akagi Haruko's friendly and sincere smile at the grocery store, I remembered Ayako's advice about trying to be friendly to other people. And how Haruko never hated me though I've said things that were highly potential in hurting her feelings—tough those words weren't wrong facts. And also where she actually brought me lunch though I've never expected or even asked her to do so.

Anyway, just like before, I was just trying to say thank you. Just like when I thanked her about the chocolate spread. And she greeted me casually there. I can assume that she won't take the candy bar wrong, right?

"Rukawa!"

I turned to see who it is. Gee, it's the math teacher. Wonder what…

"Rukawa!" he approached me still with his high voice. "Going somewhere I presume? Look at this!" He handed me sheets of papers. Oh, it was last week exam.

"If you keep doing such grade, I shall talk to the teacher board to restrict your activities at the basketball club, got that!? You'd better work your brain more than your muscles!"

After the teacher left, I led my way back to the rooftop. No turning back. But… about the restriction thing, now that's serious.

-------------------

"Is that so?" Captain Akagi thought for a while after he said that.

"That's not very good, Rukawa…" Kogure spoke too.

The three of us went silent inside the locker room. Yeah. I've decided to tell captain about the grade and restriction threat. I think he's quite a brain to help me about my failing grades.

"So…" I spoke finally, "Can you guys help me?"

"I'd be glad to, but I'm rather busy myself on my study. Besides basketball, I also have to concentrate on going to University," Kogure seemed sorry.

"I know," Akagi said.

"Uh, yeah, but I was talking to Rukawa…" Kogure replied.

"No. I mean I know how to solve your problem, Rukawa."

"Really?" I replied rather hopefully inside. Hey, it's about basketball.

"Yes. You are going to have some tutoring with my sister on your spare time. She's also at the first grade like you, so she'll be able to tutor you more effectively because you guys share the same subject. Haruko is good at math. Well, at other subjects too, actually."

Huh?

"Oh, it's a good idea, Akagi," Kogure agreed with him.

Huh??

"Now let's start our practice." Akagi and Kogure went out the locker room leaving me in disbelieve.

If I'm not mistaken… captain only has one sibling. A younger sister.

Get me a chocker and call me Fido if it could be worse than this… Akagi Haruko is gonna be my tutor.

God… spare me…

-----------------------

As usual, Akagi Haruko and her gang watched our practice session during this lunch break. That's what made it harder because though I still can concentrate on my practicing, I was still wondering how the tutoring session with Akagi Haruko is gonna be.

My mood suddenly shook every time I recalled that. Only doing my dribbling and shooting succeeded in pulling me up together again.

As captain alarmed us for a quick break, I saw Sakuragi approached Haruko as usual. Having her as my tutor might be bad, but got restricted to play basketball is the worst of them all. I guess I have to accept captain's solution. Hm, I think I'll just ask her favor right now. No time to waste when it's about my basketball career (which career anyway…??)

"Break's over, men! Continue our practice! Sakuragi, you too!" Captain called out.

"Just a minute, Gori!" That aho replied.

I sighed and approached him and Haruko.

"Now!!" Captain Gori started to roar.

But that redhead baka still persisted "I said just a…"

"Get back there, do aho," I said as I got behind him.

"Kitsune! Don't you dare…"

"I think you should go back practicing, Sakuragi-kun…" Haruko spoke to Sakuragi carefully. I guess she was avoiding messy situation where captain might punch the redhead on top of his empty head.

Sakuragi turned to her again cheerfully, "If you said so…". He quickly went to our teammates in the court. I walked behind him before captain called me out too.

As I was walking away, suddenly I remembered about my tutoring—again. I turned back to ask her favor, "Haruko, wait."

"Huh?" She turned back too facing me. It seemed that she and her gang were ready to leave.

"Ah, R-Rukawa-kun? You should go back practicing, my brother might be mad at you…"

Hm, thanks for taking time to consider that, anyway, "Are you busy tomorrow?" I straightly got to my point. Don't wait until tomorrow—or should I say the day after tomorrow—to start my lesson.

She seemed startled a bit before she replied, "Tomorrow? Uh... well, tomorrow is Sunday, and I got no plan…"

Good. "Good. I need your help."

"M-my help?"

"Rukawaa!! What are you doing there!!?" I guess captain snapped out to see me ignoring his instruction.

"Huh!? Kitsune! Stay away from Haruko-chan!!" Oh, now this redhead baka came to drag me there?

I sighed inside. I guess right now isn't the right time to talk about the details. "I'll call you later," I said and went to the rest of the guys and the fiercely captain Gori.

"Kitsune! What did you say to her!?" Sakuragi was still wandering around me.

"None of your business."

"Teme…!!"

"Sakuragi! Rukawa! Get back here, you idiots!!" Captain roared again, angrier than before.

And there I have it… Gori punch on my head. Damn you stupid redhead!!

**------------------------**

I walked to the phone table after having my bath. Rubbing the towel on my head to dry my hair, I picked up the phone to call Haruko to talk about the tutoring for tomorrow.

It has passed dinner time so I think I won't disturb her family dining. Yes, just so you know, I'm a person with good manners sometimes… sometimes only.

Two rings and I immediately got connected. As the phone picked up at the other end of the line, I heard a chipmunk voice, "Moshimoshi, Akagis' residence." Hm, I'll try not to think that she waited the whole night for the phone to ring.

"Moshimoshi, may I speak to Akagi Haruko?" I just had to say that though I'm pretty sure it was her speaking.

"Haruko's speaking… Umm… is this Rukawa-kun?"

"Yes." So, she knew.

"Well… how can I help you, Rukawa-kun?"

"You see, I said before that I need your help. It's about my grades…"

"What's wrong? Are your grades failing?"

I held my breath to keep my temper. Thank you for the worried tone in your voice, but let me finish… "Yes, my math grades are failing. The teacher told me if I don't fix that, I could get restricted to play basketball."

"Oh, no… That's bad. The team needs you so much…"

Thanks, I know that, anyway, "Captain said you are good at math, so I wanna ask your help to tutor me. Is that alright with you?"

"Me…??"

"Yes."

A pause for some seconds.

"If you're busy that would be fine-"

"No! I mean… Sure, I can help you, Rukawa-kun!"

I kinda startled and confused to hear her shout. Okay, thanks for agreeing to help, but you don't have to be so enthusiastic. And why should you pause if you are that willing, anyway?

"Nii-chan haven't told me about this."

"Perhaps he planned to tell you but he didn't know I was going to call you this soon."

"Oh, yes. Perhaps so."

Another pause.

I guess both of us didn't know what else to talk about. I should end the conversation myself because I've got to my point, but don't know why I didn't do it. I tried to think. There must be something else I have to tell her about the tutoring.

"…Umm… Rukawa-kun…"

I heard her unsure voice.

"…Rukawa-kun? Are you still there…?"

"Yes." I felt another Déjà vu. Maybe it's because this whole pausing and careful conversation.

"If… If you need help on other subjects, that would be okay for me," I heard her again, "I mean, I think I'm pretty good at other subjects too… so, perhaps I can help you out if you want…"

"Thanks, but I think math will be just fine for me right now." _Right now?_ Did I spoke as if there will be another favor I need to ask her??

"Umm, alright. So… you've asked me whether I got plan for tomorrow, I guess you wanna start the tutoring tomorrow?"

"Yes. I'll come to your house tomorrow."

"Oh… okay… What time you'll be here?"

"Let's start at 10 am if you don't mind."

"No, not at all. I'll see you at 10 then!" She sounded cheerful.

"Yes."

Then, another pause.

Hang up, Kaede. Matters were discussed. Time and place were all set up. Hang up.

"…Umm…" I heard her again.

"Well, thank you. See you tomorrow."

_click_

I quickly hung up before another conversation started. I felt silly actually. If didn't want to continue the talking, then why the hell I didn't straightly say goodbye and put down the phone?

I suck.

You suck, Kaede.

I entered my room still with the towel on my head. After the weird situation I felt while talking on the phone, I'm hoping everything will be just fine tomorrow.

-------------------

Sunday morning. I usually uses this kind of day in such perfect weather to play the b-ball in some public court. But today is different. I have to drag my feet to do other thing I'm not too interested at. Studying.

Akagi Haruko was the one who opened the door for me. Wasn't surprised of that.

"Where's captain?" I asked as I sat on the couch. I expected him to be around and perhaps we could discuss about some recent matches and Shohoku's opponent teams to keep me from bored out.

"He went to my relative's with my dad," Haruko replied. "Well, which part you want to discuss first?" She straightly opened her text book.

Oh, gee… straightly to the numbers. Hang on, Kaede. It's for your basketball career sake.

Along the tutoring went on, I think captain was right. Haruko _is_ good at math. Her teaching method was good and was able to keep me stay awake. She also taught me some tricks in finishing the calculations using 'shortcut formulas'.

I think I'll be able to shut that math teacher's mouth and prove him that I work my brain as good as I work my muscles.

-----------------------

"I don't understand why you're failing on math," Haruko said while we took a tea break after that exhausting period. "Because you quickly understand what I explained to you," she said again.

"Maybe it's because I always sleeps in class," I replied easily. Yeah, that's the truth. I can't keep my eyes open and my head up.

"Really?" She seemed in between surprised and amazed.

"Yes."

"Maybe you're bored, am I right?"

"Maybe." Yeah, perhaps so.

"But… you're not sleeping this time. Why?"

I wasn't able to give a quick reply. I was suddenly thinking about it too myself. And strangely I don't think teaching method is the answer.

"………I don't know." That's all I can say finally.

Haruko seemed to think about it herself. Wonder what theory is running around in her head. But from her expressions, I guess it's nothing rich.

Compared to the time she started her tutoring a couple hours ago, this time she looked more relax. She was somewhat nervous back there but now she can talk casually. Just like when we accidentally met at the corridor yesterday where I gave her the candy bar.

Hm…

I put down my cup of tea, "Ano…"

"What?' She lifted her face.

"Do you like the candy bar?" I chose my tone carefully. I didn't want to sound like I was hoping for a good response.

"Huh?"

".…..Do you-…" Once again I chose my tone.

"Y-yes! I like it!" She quickly answered. Her nearly shouting voice was similar to the one where she agreed to tutor me on the phone last night.

"Actually…" I look down to my cup, "I didn't plan to give that to you that day…" I shifted my eyes to her "But when I saw you, I guess I have to show my appreciation. And that candy bar is the only thing I got in my pocket that time."

She stared back at me. I can't tell what she was thinking.

"I hope you didn't get me wrong," I said again.

She was still pausing as if she waited for me to speak again.

"Did you?" I ask her rather carefully.

She smiled softly, "Not at all. I know you just want to say thank you."

I felt relieve. Hey, she's captain's sister. Wonder what kind of Gori Punch I'll receive if Haruko claimed I wasn't being nice to her.

I honestly don't want her to get me wrong just because I gave her the sweets. It was simply a way to thank her and nothing more. Though, I felt inside that her feelings is now a matter I should take note of too. Weird…

Am I becoming like that aho Sakuragi Hanamichi who runs to Haruko every time he sees her? Though, aho or no aho, he sure showed extra attention towards her. I guess he likes her that much—Gees, I talked like I know about such things…

But compare to me, could it be that Sakuragi actually _knows_ a lot about that than me?

Does Haruko know how Sakuragi feels towards her?

I straighten myself a bit on the couch, "Anyway, yesterday Sakuragi was talking about shrimp rolls. You… brought him lunch?"

"Huh? Uh, no. He brought me."

"He did?" He did??

"Yeah… it was a little bit salty, but the thought that counts," she smiled with her eyes gazed down as if she was having something in her mind.

I sighed imagining how 'a little bit salty' it was, "He's good in nothing."

"Well, it was salty on the tongue, but it was sweet on the heart," Haruko mumbled still with her eyes stared down.

Sweet on the heart.

How actually that 'sweet on the heart' tasted?

You actually can create something that could be considered 'tasted sweet' with your own hands?

I stared at her. "……..I guess I'm pretty good at shrimp rolls."

"You are?" she lifted her face and exposed her rather disbelieved expression.

"Maybe so-so." Hell no, I can't even make my own onigiri.

"Maybe you could teach Sakuragi-kun to make some," she chuckled.

"Maybe I could bring you some."

"Huh?"

Gosh! I wanted to 'huh' myself too! What's with that weird act offering someone to bring her food? Did I sounded like someone's wife?

I slowly took a breath, "I guess-… a candy bar isn't worthy to your sandwiches. I'll bring you some shrimp rolls tomorrow."

Suddenly she seemed to be a bit panic, "B-but you don't have to… I mean… you didn't even taste the sandwiches. So… you don't have to bother… I mean… it was for you, but I gave it to Sakuragi-kun… so…"

"The thought that counts," I assured her.

Suddenly Akagi Haruko's face turned pink and then red.

"The-the candy bar you gave me was sweet on the heart too, Rukawa-kun. So… so you don't have to… I-I can see that you're sincere… Really…" She spoke with her blushing face tilted down. I don't know how to say it, she looks… funny?

"Okay then…" I said casually before she erupted. Her face was flat red!

"So, shall we continue?" She took her text book and started to open the pages.

Tea break's over. We continued my math tutoring.

----------------------

Since I am very serious in keeping me away from club activities restriction, I'm doing my homework at night.

While working on it, I couldn't help on keep thinking why I asked and said unusual stuff to Akagi Haruko. Stuff that I usually don't even give a damn about. Why I wanna know how she thinks about Sakuragi bringing her lunch?

Since when what she thinks and what she feels became matters that matter to me?

Feelings… is that it?

The one that made me distracted and being unreasonable like this…?

As far as I can remember, since I joined mini-basket at elementary, my most devotion set only to that sport called basketball. I was so focused on my goal to be better and best at it.

But look at me now, occupied over some shrimp rolls I don't even know how to make. Well… and… also over other thing…

I yawned and realizing I already passed my bedtime (what bedtime… I got random of that). To keep me awake, I went down to the kitchen to grab some snacks. But as I reached my room, the snacks were abandoned and I led myself to my comfortable bed.

Oyasumi, world… And to you, whoever you are who invented mathematics, you should play basketball more to know how your invention making me busy right now…

-------------------

After finishing morning practice, I and captain Akagi talked for a while in the locker room before we went to our classes. We were discussing about my study matters.

"Rukawa, Mr. Ishii—your math teacher have told me himself about the restriction thing and he said he needs my assist in supervising you since I'm the captain of this club," captain spoke as we sat, "I guess he had talked to the other teachers about your grades and attitude in class, so right now it's not only about considering your grades in math, but also in other subjects. So if you find any difficulties or other things related to your studies, just let me know, okay? You can also talk to Kogure and Ayako if you want. They'll pass it to me."

"Alright."

"Anyway," captain said again, "How was your tutoring with Haruko?"

"It was fine." Wonder why he asked this. Being such a nosy big brother?

"Good then. Well, let's get to our classes now. We might be late."

----------------------

I walked to my class tried not to mutter. How could that teacher do that?? He hasn't even seen my progress and he already sang out loud to the whole teacher board about my failing grades?

Grownups… You can never tell how they can be very sleazy…

But first thing first. I gotta fix my academic history or else my existence in the basketball club will be history.

Ah, what a coincidence. Right on time. I saw Akagi Haruko walking in front of me. Well, I have to pass my own classroom to get to her, but I need her help for another session of private lesson. I didn't have to walk faster to catch her up.

"Haruko…"

She turned around "Yes?"

"Can I ask for another favor about the tutoring?"

"Sure!" She answered immediately. She seemed… delighted?

"How about tomorrow? Is that fine with you?"

Her sheer smile disappeared. "Ah… I… can't…"

You can't? "Oh, is that so. How about the day after tomorrow?"

"Sure!"

"Well, okay…" I turned to left. But I guess I left my thoughts back there where I was standing. I don't mean to be such a big-headed, but I thought she was going to agree immediately to tutor me tomorrow.

"Haruko…" Before I realized it, I was standing facing her again. She was already a few steps further but she quickly turned back when I called her. Her face was rather surprised.

"Yes? What is it, Rukawa-kun?"

What am I doing here standing like this??

"This is really none of my business, but do you have any plan for tomorrow?" I can't believe I actually said that, but deep inside I really want to know the answer to my question.

Haruko didn't reply instantly. She stared at me back. Perhaps she was as confused as I am right now.

"Um, yes… I got a plan to go out for tomorrow," she replied softly.

Oh, so you got your own occasion. Okay, Kaede. You got your answer. Go.

"Uh… well, I should go back to my class." Haruko was the one to leave first. Perhaps she felt weird seeing me like this. I felt weird myself too.

"With who?"

What?

"Ah?" She slightly turned back.

"You got a plan for tomorrow… with whom you're going?"

"A friend."

Oh. Alright.

"Do I… know him?"

Huh? But yes, do I?

"No. You don't know him." I thought I heard her tone was rather dry.

"Oh. Sorry that I asked too much. This is really none of my business. Gomen."

"It's okay…"

I instantly left for my classroom.

Sure it is! Sure it's none of your business, Kaede!! Why do you have to wanna know!? You would be pissed off yourself if anyone should bother with your own business, and why the hell you did that for!?

I can't understand myself. I hate being losing myself like this.

_Damn it!!!_

-----------------------

"Rukawa, I received some good news from the teachers," captain Akagi and Kogure approached me with merry faces before we begin our last practice period for today.

"What news?"

"They said you're paying attention to the lessons now, and you also prove good progression in some quizzes."

"I guess you really did your homework, Rukawa. Nice one," Kogure smiled.

"Thanks."

Wonder why those teacher didn't tell me about it themselves. Perhaps they don't want to admit that I could change this fast. Well, what can I say, you chose the right motivation, guys.

Since I got alarmed about my failing grades—especially when yesterday captain told me about what that math teacher spoke to the rest of the teacher board, I've been really worked my pants out to gain good records on my studies due to the whole restriction thing. Especially after what had happened yesterday where I was totally losing myself and being someone else I don't recognize—and worse, I was being like that in front of Akagi Haruko. Or maybe I was being like that because it was Akagi Haruko…

Aargh! Stop thinking, Kaede! Focus, remember? No fancy grades equals no basketball equals no living…

"Okay, men, let's start with stretching!" Captain shouted to begin the session.

"Right on, Gori!"

"Shut up Sakuragi! Do your stretching!" Gori, I mean, captain growled to Sakuragi. I think he was mad for someone called him 'Gorilla'. I wonder why he didn't smack that idiot on the head as an extra service.

By the way, that redhead was being so excited since yesterday. But unlike he is, he didn't say anything to anyone of what have made him so. It's so unlike him thinking that he usually brags about anything that made him excited. But the most suspicious thing was that he kept on glancing me once a while and grinned proudly.

So stupid and so weird…

And speaking about weirdness, Haruko and her gang didn't show up on our practice sessions as usual right after the last time I talked to her yesterday. You know, the one where I was losing myself—aargh, damn it! Quit thinking already!

When we were all done and ready to leave the gym, captain called me.

"Rukawa, Anzai-sensei has set some offense patterns for our team. This time the patterns we'll use are rather different, especially on your position. I need to discuss about this with you before I got to the rest of the team. If you don't mind gong home later than you usually do, we can discuss it now."

"I got something to do at home right now, it's about my studies. If it's okay with you, I'd like to go home first then we can discuss it at your house."

Captain smiled slightly. I guess he felt relieve seeing me concerning about my studies like this. "Well, alright. What time you'll be done?"

"I'll meet you at ten."

"Fine. See you then."

---------------------

Around seven pm, I already felt sleepy. If I were doing my personal practice at a time like this, I won't feel anything but energized. But doing homework and other school stuff really gave me the hard time to keep awake.

I decided to go outside to the public basketball court. I really can't leave that activity out. Some dribbling and shooting will send fresh oxygen to my brain. After that I'm planning to go to captain's house to discuss the offense patterns he told me about.

Normally I would be riding on my beloved bike, but right now I felt like walking. Just walking slowly and enjoying the night breeze. I got plenty of time anyway.

As I was nearly reached the public hoop, my curiosity was aroused when I saw quite a crowd of people standing around in a parking lot of a building. Some were scattering around the pavement. Oh, it must be 'Yamatoya House'. It's a medium sized building where they usually held live houses and other music showcases. These people must be lining up to see a concert or something.

I passed the crowd and the line of people queuing to enter the building. Some banners exposed what band is going to play for concert. 'The Blue Hearts'. I know the band but I only know a few of their songs. I'm not that in to their type of music.

I kept on walking casually and took some time to look around.

Suddenly I stopped my feet to notice something in that line of people. I stood there for a while deciding should or should not I went to look again what I thought I saw.

After some minutes, I eventually went there. I approached a certain part of that lining people and stood in the crowd of people scattered outside the line.

The light was rather dim, but I was able to assure myself of what I thought I saw back there. Akagi Haruko… and Sakuragi. They were standing inside that line, queuing to see the concert.

So… this must be the reason that redhead was being so excited and proud. He took her to a concert. Just the two of them I supposed.

I don't know how long I stood there before I decided to leave. Perhaps it was only for some seconds but then it also felt for hours.

I felt weird inside my gut. It didn't feel that good. Actually it felt bad. I can't understand why.

I insisted to go to the public hoop. I want to get rid of this bad feelings I'm feeling. Look at this… I'm going to play my game not because it's natural, but to get rid of something.

Damn it…

------------------------

It was nearly 10.10 pm when I got to the neighborhood where captain's house is. I was too enjoying my game at the hoop when I remembered about me meeting him. Actually it took me quite a time to forget what I saw at the concert area before I could really enjoy my personal practice.

I was about twelve meters to captain's house. There were two people standing in front of the gate. As I walked closer, it couldn't be wrong. They were Haruko and Sakuragi… again. So, they had gone home from the concert.

They were talking but I couldn't hear what they were talking about. Perhaps they were saying goodnight to each other or something like that.

I kept on walking tried not to bother about their presence. It was captain who I want to meet anyway. Perhaps if they are still going to stand and talk there, I'm just gonna ask Haruko about his brother and tell her that I got an appointment to meet him.

I got behind Sakuragi, not too close. I was ready to ask Haruko…

"Rukawa-kun?" I heard her mumbling. She seemed very surprised.

"What are you doing here?" Sakuragi-kun turned to me. From the look on his face, I know he's annoyed.

"I'm here to meet captain. I got an appointment with him," I said straightly.

"Why would you wanna meet him this late? I bet that's just a reason you made up. I know you must be following us, right?" The redhead idiot sounded persisting. Following them?? Now I'm annoyed.

"Why would I do that?" You silly…

"Well, if you want to meet Gori, go ahead and walk in. You interrupted our conversation," He snorted and pointed the door.

I straightly went to the door. I passed both of them casually. Gotta get them out of my vision. So annoying.

I met captain inside. After we sat and talked in the guest room for some minutes, Mrs. Akagi brought us tea, I greeted her politely.

Captain explained some stuff about the offense plans to me. He got some papers and a scrapbook in his hand.

"Hold on, Rukawa. I think I left some of the papers in my room upstairs. I'm going to get it. Be right back."

"Okay."

Captain seemed so excited about the plans and other things. After seeing and hearing it myself, I felt so too.

Suddenly I noticed someone walking not too far away beside my seat.

"Um, hi…"

I glanced at the person. Haruko was standing there. I guess Sakuragi already left.

I nodded a bit to let her know I heard her greetings.

"You got an appointment with my brother this late. Is it about the basketball club?"

I thought she was going to went straight to her room after greeted me. "Yes," I replied her.

Though I wasn't looking, I knew she was still standing there.

"Well, I must go to my room now. Goodnight," she said finally and went to leave the guest room.

I just can't help my curiosity and my big fat lips. "Haruko…"

"Yes?"

"You're still gonna tutor me tomorrow?" I asked without looking at her.

"Y-yes… sure. I promised you, right?"

"Okay…"

"Okay… Goodnight…"

"Uh… Haruko…" God! Stop meddling, Kaede!! "You went out with him?" But I just couldn't help it.

"Who?" Haruko's voice was very soft I almost can't hear her.

"Sakuragi."

Pause for a moment. "Only to a concert…"

"Oh…" Yeah, I knew that, actually.

"Rukawa-kun…" she said again, "I'm sorry that I lied yesterday. I said you don't know the person I was going with, but actually you do. I'm sorry…"

Huh? You're sorry? I don't even remember you said that yesterday. But… you sounded feeling so guilty…?

"It doesn't really matter to me... I don't mean to meddle…" I said to excuse my inappropriate curiosity and perhaps also to make her less felt guilt.

"I don't mind if you do…"

I was silenced to hear her reply. Rather surprised and very confused too.

Suddenly she left the room. I can hear her rushed climbing the stairs of her house. I think she bumped captain because I heard him.

Captain and I continued our discussion for a couple of hours. After we're all done, I excused myself to go home. It was very late I hope I could still get a bus home. I think it should be better than walking.

Captain walked me to the front door, still excited in talking some matters we were discussing before. I was about to leave when suddenly someone called me.

"Ah, Rukawa-kun…?"

Haruko was standing behind us.

"What is it, Haruko?" Captain asked her sister.

"Umm, I'd like to talk to Rukawa-kun about our tutoring session…" She stared at captain rather carefully.

"Okay…" He said after a second of thinking. He turned to me, "I'll tell Kogure about what we've just discussed earlier." Then he left the two of us after I agreed him.

Though she was the one who said wanna talk to me, but Haruko was as silent as me for some seconds. She just smiled slightly. Perhaps girls are use in doing this. Such a waste of time to think it again.

"Um, do you still need my help for tomorrow?" She finally asked.

"Sure." Hey, I didn't say anything about canceling, if you remember any of that…

"Alright then. So, what time you'll be here?"

I suddenly remembered tomorrow's another weekend. So I got a whole day if in any case I want to spend it studying. Thinking so… why don't we just…

"We won't be here," I said quite sure myself.

"Huh?"

"I mean, maybe it would be good for me if I got my tutoring at a library. Maybe I could also borrow some books that I might need."

"Uh, but… school's off tomorrow…"

Yes, I know that. Who would want to go there anyway? "What about the public library? I think I'll have my tutoring there," I suggested.

I don't know if I was seeing things or not, but Akagi Haruko's expression wasn't just surprised but her face was also blushing.

Stop looking at me like that! Stop thinking whatever you were thinking right now! We're just going to study, okay?

"If… that's okay with you," I said then because she really looked weird an it kinda scarry in one or another way.

"S-sure! Why not? I think library is a good idea! So… I'll see you there?" Now she seemed excited.

"Yes. At ten."

"Okay!"

"Well, goodnight." I decided to leave immediately. It was really getting late. Haruko followed me to the front terrace. I didn't expect her to do that but I didn't mind.

"See you tomorrow, Rukawa-kun," she smiled.

I glanced at her. And at her smile. I nodded and left her house.

-----------------------

As I walked to the bus stop from Akagis' residence, I was thinking about lots of things.

About the weird yet bad feelings I felt when I saw Haruko at the concert area with Sakuragi, about me with my sudden curiosity, about Haruko who really sounded guilty though I don't understand why she should, about her didn't mind me asking her questions that actually none of my concern, and about me suddenly thinking to have my tutoring outside…

Weird things happened to me lately. I am so bothered because I can't understand them.

I know I feel something.

But I don't want to feel it.

I know something is starting to get a hold of me.

But I constantly pushing it away.

I guess I'm afraid of losing what I've been holding for so many times. I'm afraid that I wouldn't be such a focused and goal oriented person anymore. I'm afraid of won't be doing anymore what I use to do for all this time.

I'm afraid of losing control of myself.

Have you ever felt wanting to have something but then you are also afraid you won't be yourself anymore if you take it?

That's what I'm feeling right now. The unexplained feelings that was trying to lurk inside of me is a thing I don't understand, yet I'm curious to know it.

What is this?

Will I be finally relieved if I accepted it?

Will it eventually trick and break me someday?

I closed my eyes. Uncertainty leads you nowhere.

……

So be it. If I was going to shattered because of it, I know I shall be able to pull myself up together again.

I think I'll give this thing a try, just a little and just for a while, just not to let me keep in confusion and uncertainty. Then I can finally decide what to do. I have other things to take care of.

I sighed and yawned. Boy, am I tired or what…?

**TO BE CONTINUED**

**---**

**Crusty's endnote: **Phew! That was quite long—for me… Anyway, the next chapter will be back to Haruko's POV.

………………

Aww!! C'mon!! Stop throwing things at me!! I was just kidding, okay!?

Well, I was planning this whole Rukawa's POV chappie will last only for two chapters. But because my recent chapters are way longer than the first chapters I posted, making the flashback scenes thru Rukawa's POV really took efforts. And it took more because I also have to insert scenes that belong to Rukawa only —that weren't in Haruko's POV chapters.

Anyway, next chapter still will be Rukawa's POV. But the next after that won't be. I'm planning to use various POVs, but Haruko's POV will still be the main POV.

And stop that throwing will you!??


	17. Taking Steps

**Disclaimer: I don't own Slam Dunk. It belongs to ****Takehiko****-sensei.**

**Crusty's**** Note**: **I'm still alive, it's just that Eames and Arthur were incepting me so often that I should stop writing fics and just keep filming their romantic household (Lord, have mercy, I love them together).**

**Taking Steps**

Rukawa's POV

The public library.

To be honest, I almost never went here. I live in my neighborhood since I was at 4th grade. The only thing I remembered about going to this place was when I need to find more information about bugs to help my summer project—yeah, another school matter.

I chose one of the tables in the library and put my books there. There's still time, I arrived twelve minutes early. I leaned back to my seat as I opened the basketball magazine I brought from home. To think again, this place isn't that boring. In fact, it's pretty comfort.

Reading some articles in the magazine, I realized perhaps I've spent some time in this place. I looked at my wrist watch, it already past five minutes from the time I should meet Akagi Haruko here. I shifted my attention to the entrance door to see if she might be arriving already.

Oh, there she was. Standing near the door, looking somewhat lost in space.

"Ah, um… good morning," she said while approaching me.

"Good morning."

Haruko took a seat right beside me. I put down my magazine and reached for my text books. I'm getting used to this. You know, this whole studying manners: open your book, read something, write something, analyze something. It's rather indifferent to basketball match—in one or another crazy way.

"Do you mind if I ask you about other subjects?" I asked Haruko during the tutoring.

"Huh? That would be fine!" she smiled. "What subject you need to ask about?"

"Physics. This part." I pointed a chapter on my book to her.

"Hmm… okay, we can start from this definition."

The tutoring went pretty fine though we discussed more subjects. I'm so lucky to have her helping me. Really gotta admit it, she's good in tutoring. Perhaps she could be a good teacher someday.

Thinking of that possibility of her future, I spontaneously looked at her face while she was reading something for me from the book. She already has this look to become a teacher. You know, the calm, intelligent, dedicated… fair… looks.

What she said suddenly snapped me out of my… my… drifting mind?

"I guess it would be enough for now. Let's have lunch." Haruko closed her book as my lesson ended.

I stood up. Yeah, actually I was starting to get hungry myself. We left the library to grab something to eat.

Outside, we strolled along the sidewalk to find a place where we could have lunch. It was pretty crowded. It was Sunday, everybody's out to do whatever they wish: kids, adults, especially teenagers.

Along the walk, I saw teenagers with their gangs or their own couples. A pair of young teens happened to walk in front of me. They were walking side by side with the girl holding her guy's arm so close (sigh… girls…), chattering happily and the girl was giggling once a while. Perhaps they were going to watch some movies or go to an amusement park.

Hm… is this how a guy and a girl will look like when they went out together? I don't mean the holding hands thing or stuff like that, I mean the 'being look like a couple'. Perhaps that's what I thought when I saw Haruko and Sakuragi at the concert area: they look like couples.

But… that wouldn't be the reason why I felt bad seeing that, right?

…_Right?_

Suddenly the pair in front of me went left to enter a building. Hey, McDonald's. Oh yeah, we were planning to have lunch, almost forgot that.

I slightly turned to Haruko walking behind me, "Do you want to eat here?"

She looked at McDonald's at her left. "Okay."

I put our orders on the table where she waited. Hey, I'm a good person when needed, you won't think I'll let her do the ordering and taking the meal to our table, right? Anyway, I straightly went to the eating. I'm indeed hungry.

As I chewed my last piece and took my cola, slightly my eyes stopped at her at a time. She was still holding half part of her burger, looking rather laid back.

"You're not that hungry, are you?"

She lifted her face to view me. "Uh, well…" She seemed somewhat nervous or perhaps embarrassed.

"Do you always eat like that?" I asked again. Well, I was just kind of curious, knowing that she's also slow in phone conversations.

"Um, yes," she replied looking rather shy. After she said that, suddenly she took a big bite on her burger. She also took a grab of her French fries. She munched quickly and she didn't even hesitate snatching her cola at the same time. No doubt she was having trouble in swallowing with such a full mouth.

So funny—I mean that in a good way…

"It's okay," I spoke. Actually I felt like chuckling. But I thought that would probably make her more embarrassed and start stuffing all the food faster than she already did just now. I took out my basketball magazine from my bag.

I said then, "You don't have to be in a hurry like that. Don't worry, I won't leave you."

Yes, I won't leave her. This whole day is for us to spend—studying—right? Haruko must be thinking I was in a rush to go some place else made her speed up her eating.

I continued my reading that was paused at the library before. I intentionally held the magazine rather high to my face. I think perhaps she felt embarrassed if someone put a comment or looking at her while she's eating. I'm a thoughtful person too myself, you know—when needed.

After maybe around fifteen to twenty minutes, I heard her again, "Um… I'm done. Do you wanna leave now?"

I put my magazine down, "Okay."

I let her exited the restaurant before me—but I didn't open the door for her if that's what you're thinking right now. They actually have a person assigned to do that for the customers.

While exiting the door, I slightly glanced at the tiny girl walking in front of me. Does she realize sometimes she looks rather funny?—I mean that in a good way.

Outside, I didn't really know where else to go. But suddenly I recalled maybe I could find myself some fresh records to accompany me for morning jog—or doing my homework.

"Do you wanna go back to the library now?" Suddenly Haruko asked me.

I glanced at her rather thinking what to say. Oh yeah, she didn't know about my own agenda, she must be feeling clueless right now. "No, I think I had enough studying today," I said then still walking ahead.

"Oh… Um, so we're going home?"

"I want to go to the music store." There, now you know where we're going.

"Um… okay… I… I'll see you tomorrow at school… Bye…"

I was rather startled to hear it. I stopped and turned around. Haruko was ready to walk away to my opposite direction.

"You're not going?" I asked her. I could hear my own voice sounded unusual.

"Well, I…" Haruko looked around her, seemed confused and clueless, "Do you want me to go with you?"

I stiffen to where I stand.

Do I want her to go with me?

Yea, do you want her to go with you, Kaede? You didn't say anything like 'let's go to the music store' or something like that, did you?

But… shouldn't she know? I mean… we went out for tutoring together from the first place, why should she think that we won't go somewhere else together too after the tutoring? Why should she think that we won't spend the rest of the day together just like when we started our tutoring today?

She should _know_ about it, right?

I turned back continuing my way to the music store. She didn't think I'm this person who will just leave after I got to what I expected, right? She got my point there and will tag along, right?

…_Right?_

…

…Maybe not right…

I instantly turned my back slightly to see if she was following me.

Nope. Negative.

Akagi Haruko was still standing right at the same spot. She stared at me glancing her from the corner of my eyes. Her confused expression was still there.

Why? Why didn't you come along…?

I moved my feet to face her entirely. "Don't just stand there looking like that. I won't leave you."

Yes. I'm not leaving you. I may be ignorant… but I'm no worse than that. Bottom line, I'm not leaving you.

She was still standing there looking at me as if she was observing me. Finally she put a smile and approached me.

I waited until she was beside me before I started walking to my destination again.

Well, so I was wrong. She didn't get it. She didn't understand that I want her to go along.

…Now, waitaminit!

Starting from the basic, do _I_ actually want her to come with me?

And if I do… for what reason?

Can't I just go to get my music by myself? Why do I need her to tag along?

Is this got to do with the weird yet mysterious feelings I'm feeling lately?

Unconsciously, I closed my mouth tight for a moment. I've chosen to try to go along with these unfamiliar feelings, right? If it brought me to questions, I can't be such a wimp and stepped back. So it made me wonder, but hell, new stuff always makes you wonder.

Finally we spotted the music store. We went inside and I tried to get rid of the confusing thoughts. I need to concentrate in finding me a good music collection.

I went to check out some new releases. Usually I'm pretty up to date about new songs, but I've been very occupied by basketball and studying matters these days made me forget about this particular interest of mine—yes, my life isn't all about the b-ball (though I'm willing to give it all to it).

My eyes stopped at a pack of CD. 'The Blue Hearts'. Isn't this the band whose concert Haruko went to?

I stared at the CD for some seconds, and then I went to listen to their samples. I wonder how this band actually sounds.

Listening to their music, they're quite okay. A couple of tracks caught my attention. As I was about to check the next track, suddenly I heard Haruko near me, "Who's that?"

"Blue Hearts," I replied without looking at her.

"Do you like Blue Hearts?"

"Mm… so-so…" I glanced her, "Do you?"

"Yes! I like them very much!" Haruko answered with an excited tone. She smiled widely, "By the way, do you know that they just held a concert yesterday?"

"Yes, I know. You went there?" I didn't know why I said that. Hell, I saw her there with my very own eyes and last night Haruko actually had said that she went.

"Why, yes!" she replied still excitedly, "Actually, Sakuragi-kun asked me to…" then Haruko's voice got lowered. Her smile faded.

I stared at her, waiting her to finish her line.

Go on, say it, you went there with him and it was a date.

But Haruko didn't continue. She just stared back. I wonder what she saw in my eyes since she seemed hesitant.

"…I went there with Sakuragi-kun yesterday…" she said finally with her face rather tilted down.

"Oh…" I shifted my attention back to the music panel in front of me. I thought I slightly saw that guilt expression on her face. "Did you have fun?" I asked again. For no reason, I don't like her putting that face, but I didn't know whether I asked that to get rid off the awkward silence or for another intention.

"Well… yeah…" Haruko replied after some seconds, "I mean, the Blue Hearts was great. I really enjoyed that concert. I mean, I seldom went to a concert, but that one was… great!"

I felt somehow relieved to hear her going all cheerful again. "What's their latest album?"

"Umm… _'Cracking shells'_. I heard it's a good one, but I haven't bought it. I got some emergency expenses this month."

I wasn't really listening to the third track and it hasn't finished yet, but I think I had enough listening. I put down the headphones to check what else on the new releases.

Choosing some CDs, my thoughts took me back to its complicated labyrinth.

So Haruko did justify again that she went to the concert with Sakuragi. She really looked reluctant in talking about that back there. Just like the time she apologized because she felt guilty lying to me about going with someone I actually know.

Why should she feel like that?

Why she didn't like me knowing that?

After grabbing a CD, I went to look for her. But as I spotted her not to far away, there was someone I would least expected to see at this time.

Sakuragi and his friends were standing before Haruko. He stared at me as I did.

"N-No, I was with Rukawa-kun," I heard Haruko. Perhaps Sakuragi was asking who she's with.

Sakuragi passed Haruko and came up to me. I sighed inside. What now. What other stupidity he's going to spill.

"Rukawa, I thought you're the human ice block. I never thought you'd ask Haruko-chan out, you sly kitsu—"

_What?_

"I didn't ask her out," I cut him. Yes, f-y-i, I _didn't_ ask her out. "I ask her to tutor me. After that we went here. By the way, I don't think that's any of your business."

"Teme!" He was ready to blow up as usual.

"Sakuragi-kun!" Haruko was clearly anxious.

Out of my prediction, Sakuragi turned to Haruko with a neutral tone opposite to his previous growl, "Sorry, Haruko-chan." Then he shifted to me again, "Rukawa, I knew it that you must be jealous because yesterday you saw me and Haruko-chan went out together."

I was annoyed of his stupid grin while he was saying that, but I was bothered more by his words.

Jealous? Me?

That redhead idiot still went on, "You envy that, that's why you asked her to tutor you today. I'm sure it's just a reason you made up. You can't think of a good reason, so you used this tutoring thing as an invitation to ask her out. Tsk-tsk, that is very lame of you, Rukawa…"

You don't know what you're talking about…

"Wow, I never thought Hanamichi could make a good deduction like that," suddenly one of his gang—the fat guy, said snickering.

"Hn? What's that supposed to mean!" Sakuragi growled to his friend.

"Me too," I stated my opinion. His friends were laughing hard made the idiot really blew to his top.

"Aargh! You ask for it, Rukawa!" he approached further.

"Sakuragi-kun! Stop! Mito, please stop him!" I heard Haruko panicking around. But I didn't mind whatever is going to happen here and now because this redhead sure has made me so annoyed and irritated.

He pierced me and I pierced back with the same tension. None of us said anything or did anything yet.

"Rukawa," he finally said, "I don't have to humiliate myself in front of everyone, especially Haruko-chan, by hitting you. How about a game tomorrow, huh? You and me."

Are you serious? You?

Actually I was going to say 'no thanks, I'm not interested', but on second thought, he would need this once a while. Let the reality hit him hard so he won't bother to challenge me the next time. Fine, I'll deal with you—you dimwit…

"Okay," I replied him.

"That was disappointing…" Sakuragi's gang seemed disappointed. Surely they were expecting some fight or whatever. Maniacs…

"Yeah, but Hanamichi is an athlete now, right?" another friend of him spoke, "He won't do anything stupid."

"You got a point there, he-he…" Sakuragi grinned proudly.

"Yeah-right! Like we would buy that!" Again, he earned mocks and laughs from his very own gang—gees, some friends…

"Temee! How dare you guys mock me!" Sakuragi chased the laughing group out of the store.

"Do aho…" I sighed. They were like these unfunny comedians.

Remembering I was holding a CD in my hand, I went to the cashier to pay. Haruko followed me and waited at the door.

After the music store, I didn't really know where else to go. But Haruko didn't ask me any more where we are going. I guess after what happened before, she had the same agreement that we'll just go on wherever we could before we're tired and bored and decided to walk home.

"What CD did you buy?" she asked, sounded slightly excited.

"_Cracking Shells_," I replied without looking.

"Really! The Blue Hearts!"

"Yes."

"That's a good choice! I'm sure you'll like them very much." She sounded _very_ excited now.

I reached out the plastic bag containing the mentioned CD for her to take. "You tell me how good they are."

"Huh?"

"Actually I'm not that sure about them. You listen to it, and then you tell me how good they are. If you said they're really good, maybe I'll listen to it."

I was kinda lost inside of me. That wasn't the line… No, that wasn't the one…

"Um… okay…" She eventually took it after hesitating for some seconds.

"Hi, Haruko-chan."

A familiar voice made me glanced. It was him again, that redhead moron.

"Sakuragi-kun? Where are the others?" Haruko asked him casually. I wonder why she cares. Oh-yeah, she's always being friendly with the whole gang, she's such a buddy-buddy person anyway.

"I told them to get lost wherever they wish. Well, I don't mean to bother you… it's just that I feel responsible to guard you from any sly person, specifically from a certain sly kitsune…" Sakuragi intentionally glanced me.

"Find a better thing to do, Do aho," I said careless.

"Nani? You mean guarding Haruko-chan isn't an important thing? Why, of course you'd think so. Because you don't want anyone get in your way, right?"

Hallucinating over some crap lately?

"Sakuragi-kun. Rukawa-kun won't do anything bad, if that's what you mean."

"Haruko-chan, you just don't know that some people could be very deceiving…" Sakuragi sighed and shook his head. I think he was hoping to look intelligent.

Haruko chuckled, "Okay, so you guard me next time, okay? I'll be fine with Rukawa-kun today."

"What? But, Haruko-chan…"

"They're waiting for you," I cut him and pointed behind him.

Sakuragi looked and found his gang grinning happily. "They always put their fingers on everything I do," he muttered.

I sighed slowly. I really felt wasting my time if I have to keep on seeing them around for the rest of the day. I think I've reached the point where I'm tired, bored and decided to walk home.

"Haruko," I slightly turned to leave, "Thanks for the help. I should be going now. Bye."

Haruko couldn't hide her startled expression (I guess my action was too sudden for her, I dunno). Kind of stumbled, she said, "Ah? Uh, okay… Bye…"

I instantly walked my own way before she even finished saying her goodbye.

I hate to admit this, but along my way home I recalled what Sakuragi said back there at the music store. About the whole jealousy thing and how I actually meant to ask Haruko out.

Last night I've decided to take a shot at this particular confusing feelings department. Now I know it wouldn't be that easy to give in to it.

It's true that when I suggested Haruko to have the tutoring outside I was thinking for a different atmosphere. It's true that today I was thinking maybe me and Haruko could spend the day doing other things besides studying. It's also true that I mean it when I said I won't leave her.

And it's also true that the CD was…

I sighed –and was a bit surprised too that I did that.

I had given in, but why does it still felt uneasy? Or perhaps I'm still hesitant about it.

At night when I was ready to hit the sack, I got a phone call from Haruko. I was the one picking up the phone in the living room and I heard her voice on the other end of the line.

"Rukawa-kun? It's me, Haruko," she said without hesitant. I was a bit amazed of her tone.

"Yes?" I replied.

"Umm, I've listened to the CD. It was great, seriously. I'm not saying this because I'm a fan of the Blue Hearts, but it's a great music. You won't sorry to have it."

"Oh, okay." I replied again. At the same time I was also thinking that perhaps this is the right time to say something… Just, something…

I heard her again, "Well, I don't think I had enough listening to it, but I'll bring it back to you at school since it's yours and you haven't listened to it—"

"Do you like it?" I quickly cut her, will a little… uneasy feeling?

"Yes! Of course I like it. Like I said, it was gre—"

"You can have it." I cut her again, with another… uneasy— or was it… nervous feeling?

"What?" Her tone sounded confused. Well, with how I said it, anyone would be, I suppose. But I can't afford having her keep asking (or at least my suspiciously in-a-nervous-state heart couldn't), so…

"I said you can have it. You like it, don't you?" …so I said.

A little silent came by. "Why do you want me to have it? It's yours, isn't it?" I heard Haruko again, still sounded confused, but also somewhat kind of interrogating.

"Yes. But you said you like it—"

"That doesn't mean I want it," this time she was the one to cut me

I was silenced. I couldn't answer her.

Dammit! I couldn't find something to say!

Or... maybe I couldn't find something to cover what actually should be said to her question.

"Rukawa-kun, may I ask you something?" she asked with a careful tone.

I kept silent, didn't really know which to say: Yes or No.

And I guess she thought it was her cue to continue because then she spoke again, "When I was at the concert area with Sakuragi-kun yesterday, I thought I saw you there too. Am I right? I mean, were you really there yesterday?"

I decided to be honest. Maybe that would stop this weird somewhat agonizing moment I couldn't understand. "…Yes, I was there," I finally replied.

"You were?" she sounded really surprised, "What were you doing there? I mean, you got an appointment with my brother, you wouldn't watch any concert, am I right?"

Damn! And I thought she'd stop asking questions! "That's all I'm gonna say to you. The rest of it is really none of your business and I got no necessary to explain it to you."

A cold silence was suddenly creeping in. I got worried was I scaring her.

"I-I'm sorry, Rukawa-kun…" I heard her again and I nearly sighed in relieve. She said again a bit stuttering, "I really don't mean to mind your business… I was just wondering… I'm really sorry!"

I closed my eyes, I guess I shouldn't be mad at her. What she meant by 'wondering' maybe it was about the 'worrying' stuff she once said (and I'm surprised I could remember that).

But Haruko, I still couldn't figure it out. Why is it important for you to worry about me? Why is it necessary to wonder things about me?

This is it, Kaede. Ask her, and she'll tell you.

"…Haruko…" I said, at the same time trying to get rid away my hesitance, "At your house, you said before that you're okay if I was meddling with your business… Why is that?"

"W-What do you mean?"

"I want to know why you're okay if I'm meddling with your business. Aren't you supposed to feel bothered?"

I could hear my own voice in my head as I asked that last question. I sounded so… ignorant. And I don't really find my ignorance is a bliss no more.

"I don't know…" she replied, her voice was soft and weak, but also pure.

"Look, Rukawa-kun…" Haruko spoke again with a regretful tone, "I'm terribly sorry if you feel that I'm minding your business. I just want you to know that I never meant so. I wasn't careful… I'm so sorry…"

I couldn't help hearing her so sorry and bashful like that. _It's okay, Haruko…_

"…Well, I do feel annoyed, but… it's okay. Don't worry. I'm not mad at you."

I thought I heard her sighed in relieve. My suspiciously in-a-nervous-state heart was beginning to relax since some minutes ago. I think I can say it now. I may be ignorant, but it's not like I can't do anything about it. So you, Haruko, hear me out…

I carefully inhaled, and spilt it out, "Anyway, you can have the CD. And if in any case you're wondering why, actually I bought it for you. So there."

Another silence. And damn, I think I spoke too fast, sheesh, shameful… I hope she caught what I said so I don't have to repeat it again.

I need to end this conversation, "Is there anything more you want to talk about?" I asked her, still kind of fast. Shameful…

"Huh? Uh, n-no…" she went stuttering again, "I mean, well, that's about it… Umm… I'll see you at school, Rukawa-kun…"

"Okay. Bye."

"Bye."

I quickly hung up while I only half-heard her said that 'Bye'.

What. Was. That.

I sighed, closed my eyes and pressing my temples. Suddenly I felt so tired. I went upstairs to my room to drop myself on my lovely bed.

While slumping on the mattress, I replayed the conversation I just had with Haruko on the phone.

So I said it. I told her that I actually bought the CD for her.

Somehow, I felt relieved, but also felt sorry for myself. _Why was I unable to say that back at the music store?_ Why do I have to wait for her to push me with questions, making me feel nervous, before I finally admit it?

Shameful… and pathetic. I felt in a loss. And I hate losing.

And dammit I suddenly remembered what that stupid Sakuragi said about me being lame. Or basically, about me being dishonest. Sometimes it's just the blokes' turn to teach you with their simple mind.

I closed my eyes trying to sleep (which never been a difficult thing for me to do).

Faint recollections started to make their way more clearly in my mind: about my one-day-tutoring with Haruko Akagi. How she perfectly portrays a (fair-faced) teacher, how sometimes she looks funny while doing something (I meant that in a good way, but I think 'funny' is not the right word, yet again I don't know what is), and how she's being… just plain kind.

And before I actually went doze off, absentmindedly, I don't know what has gotten in to me, I mumbled, "I gave you that CD, because I thought you'd be happy, and I'd be happy if you are."

Oyasumi, world.

**TO BE CONTINUED**

**Crusty's endnote: I love you guys, thanks for reading *kisses***


End file.
